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		<title>Day 6</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2009/11/30/day-6/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Nov 2009 12:04:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[7am. Nothing. Got bags under my eyes from crying. No appetite at all. Still haven&#8217;t sent that email. I really need to study but u just want to go back to sleep.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=25&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>7am. Nothing. Got bags under my eyes from crying. No appetite at all. Still haven&#8217;t sent that email. I really need to study but u just want to go back to sleep. </p>
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			<media:title type="html">London</media:title>
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		<title>Im hurt</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2009/11/30/im-hurt/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Nov 2009 05:57:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s day 6 and he still hasn&#8217;t called. What happened to &#8220;i love you&#8221; where did that go? I&#8217;m so hurt and confused right now. It&#8217;s a pain so much different than I ever expected. Shame on me&#8230; It happened again.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=24&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It&#8217;s day 6 and he still hasn&#8217;t called. What happened to &#8220;i love you&#8221; where did that go? I&#8217;m so hurt and confused right now. It&#8217;s a pain so much different than I ever expected. Shame on me&#8230; It happened again.</p>
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		<title>60 Christian Character Builders</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2009/01/12/60-christian-character-builders/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Jan 2009 03:57:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[1. Attentive: Paying attention to and respecting the person by giving genuine courtesy and consideration to God&#8217;s Word or the person&#8217;s word Hebrews 2:1 So we must listen very carefully to the truth we have heard, or we may drift away from it. 2. Available: Willing to adjust my schedule to fit the desires of [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=21&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span style="font-family:Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:medium;">1. Attentive: Paying attention to and respecting the person by giving genuine<br />
courtesy and consideration to God&#8217;s Word or the person&#8217;s word</span></p>
<p>Hebrews 2:1<br />
So we must listen very carefully to the truth we have heard, or we may drift away from it.</p>
<p>2. Available: Willing to adjust my schedule to fit the desires of God and others</p>
<p>Mark 1:17-18<br />
Jesus called out to them, &#8220;Come, be my disciples, and I will show you how to fish for people!&#8221; And they left their nets at once and went with him.</p>
<p>3. Committed: Giving the Lord control of my life</p>
<p>Psalm 37:5<br />
Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and He will help you.</p>
<p>4. Compassionate: Expressing a deep feeling of love and concern for others&#8217; needs<br />
and difficulties</p>
<p>I Peter 3:8-12<br />
Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, &#8220;Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil an his lips from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and His ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.&#8221;</p>
<p>5. Confident: What I say or do will benefit me and, more importantly, others</p>
<p>Philippians 4:13<br />
For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.</p>
<p>6. Consistent: Living my daily life according to God&#8217;s principles</p>
<p>I Corinthians 15:58<br />
So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and steady, always enthusiastic about the Lord&#8217;s work, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless</p>
<p>7. Content: Accepting whatever God provides for my life</p>
<p>Philippians 4:11<br />
Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to get along happily whether I have much or little.</p>
<p>8. Cooperative: Working together in unity and harmony</p>
<p>Ephesians 4:3<br />
Always keep yourselves united in the Holy Spirit, and bind yourselves together with peace.</p>
<p>9. Courageous: Realizing that God had given me the strength to face any trial or<br />
danger.</p>
<p>Deuteronomy 31:6<br />
Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid of them! The Lord your God will go ahead of you. He will neither fail you or forsake you.</p>
<p>10. Creative: Using the talents I have been given to serve the Lord</p>
<p>I Timothy 4:14<br />
Do not neglect the spiritual gift you received through the prophecies spoken to you when the elders of the church laid their hands on you.</p>
<p>11. Decisive: Make decisions based on God&#8217;s perfect will</p>
<p>Romans 12:2<br />
Don&#8217;t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.</p>
<p>12. Dependable: Being reliable and trustworthy</p>
<p>Colossians 1:10<br />
Then the way you live will always honor and please the Lord, and you will continually do good, kind things for others. All the while, you will learn to know God better and better</p>
<p>13. Determination: Doing all I can to accomplish my part in God&#8217;s plan</p>
<p>Hebrews 12:12-13<br />
So take a new grip with your tired hands and stand firm on your shaky legs. Mark out a straight path for your feet. Then those who follow you, though they are weak and lame, will not stumble and fall but will become strong.</p>
<p>14. Devotion: Setting my desire and hope upon God</p>
<p>Colossians 3:2<br />
Let heaven fill your thoughts. Do not think only about things down here on earth.</p>
<p>15. Diligent: Working hard to do my best for the Lord</p>
<p>Colossians 3:23<br />
Working hard and cheerfully at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.</p>
<p>16. Discreet: Forming sound opinions and giving serious attention and thought<br />
to what one is doing</p>
<p>Psalm 112:5<br />
All goes well for those who are generous, who lends freely and conducts their business fairly.</p>
<p>17. Efficient: Making the most of every situation</p>
<p>Ephesians 5:16<br />
Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days.</p>
<p>18. Fairness: Seeing a situation from the viewpoint of each person involved.</p>
<p>Matthew 7:12<br />
Do for others what you would like them to do for you. This is a summary of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.</p>
<p>19. Faithful: Being loyal and true to the One I serve</p>
<p>Matthew 25:21<br />
The master full of praise. &#8220;Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let&#8217;s celebrate together!&#8221;</p>
<p>20. Fearless: Facing danger boldly with God&#8217;s strength</p>
<p>II Timothy 1:7<br />
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.</p>
<p>21. Forgiving: Overlooking a wrong that was done unto me</p>
<p>Colossians 3:13<br />
You must make allowance for each other&#8217;s fault and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.</p>
<p>22. Friendly: Desiring to know and help others</p>
<p>Proverbs 18:24<br />
There are &#8220;friends&#8221; who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother</p>
<p>23. Generous: Giving to others because God has given to me</p>
<p>Deuteronomy 16:17<br />
All must give as they are able, according to the blessings given to them by the Lord your God.</p>
<p>24. Gentleness: Being patient and kind with others</p>
<p>II Timothy 2:24<br />
The Lord&#8217;s servant must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone. They must be able to teach effectively and be patient with difficult people.</p>
<p>25. Godliness: Changing our lives to line up with God&#8217;s character</p>
<p>III John 11<br />
Dear friend, don&#8217;t let this bad example influence you. Follow only what is good. Remember that those who do good prove that they are God&#8217;s children, and those who do evil prove that they do not know God.</p>
<p>26. Honest: Being truthful and doing what is right</p>
<p>II Corinthians 8:21<br />
We are careful to be honorable before the Lord, but we also want everyone else to know we are honorable</p>
<p>27. Humble: Understanding my weakness and striving not to lift up myself<br />
above others</p>
<p>I Peter 5:5<br />
You younger men, accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, serve each other in humility, for &#8220;God sets himself against the proud but he shows favor to the humble.&#8221;</p>
<p>28. Joyful: Being filled with happiness in Christ</p>
<p>Ephesians 5:19<br />
Then they will sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, making music to the Lord in your hearts.</p>
<p>29. Just: Doing all things right, according to God&#8217;s laws</p>
<p>Genesis 6:9<br />
This is the history of Noah and his family, Noah was a righteous man of the only blameless living on earth at the time. He consistently followed God&#8217;s will and enjoyed a close relationship with Him.</p>
<p>30. Kindness: Showing a loving attitude towards others</p>
<p>Ephesians 4:32<br />
Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.</p>
<p>31. Loyal: Showing my commitment to a person or cause at all times</p>
<p>John 15:13-17<br />
Greater love has no one than this, You can ask for anything in My name, and I will that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants because a servant does not know his master&#8217;s business. Instead I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit &#8211; fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other.</p>
<p>32. Meekness: Yielding everything to God</p>
<p>Psalms 22:26<br />
The poor will eat and be satisfied. All who seek the Lord will praise Him. Their hearts will rejoice with everlasting joy.</p>
<p>33. Merciful: Showing more kindness than justice requires</p>
<p>Luke 6:36<br />
You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.</p>
<p>34. Obedience: Willing to do what God requires of me</p>
<p>Deuteronomy 13:4<br />
Serve only the Lord your God and fear Him alone. Obey His commands, listen to His voice, and cling to Him</p>
<p>35. Optimistic: Thinking of the best in all situations</p>
<p>Romans 8:25<br />
But if we look forward to something we don&#8217;t have yet, we must wait patiently and confidently.</p>
<p>36. Patience: Going through a difficult situation with calm endurance and not<br />
complaining or losing self-control.</p>
<p>Psalms 33:20<br />
We depend on the Lord alone to save us. Only He can help us, protecting us like a shield</p>
<p>37. Peaceful: Yielding myself to the Lord for His control, for He is our peace.</p>
<p>Philippians 4:7<br />
If you do this, you will experience God&#8217;s peace which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard our hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus</p>
<p>38. Perseverance: Being able to cope with the stress to accomplish God&#8217;s work.</p>
<p>Galations 6:9<br />
So don&#8217;t get tired of doing what is good. Don&#8217;t get discouraged and give up, for we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time.</p>
<p>39. Persuasive: Helping others to understand God&#8217;s point of view</p>
<p>II Timothy 2:25<br />
They should gently teach those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people&#8217;s hearts, and they will believe the truth.</p>
<p>40. Prompt: Being on time and quick to act when a request is made</p>
<p>Ecclesiastes 3:1<br />
There is a time for everything, a season for every activity under heaven.</p>
<p>41. Prudent: Seeing what is likely to happen and giving careful thought in<br />
acting and planning</p>
<p>Proverbs 14:15<br />
Only simpletons believe everything they are told! The prudent carefully consider their steps.</p>
<p>42. Purposeful: Knowing God&#8217;s will for my life</p>
<p>Timothy II 1:9<br />
It is God who saved us and chose us to live holy life. He did this not because we deserved it, but because that was His plan long before the world began-to show his love and kindness to us through Christ Jesus.</p>
<p>43. Resourceful: Ready to take on projects that others would overlook or discard</p>
<p>I Thessalonians 4:11<br />
This should be your ambition: To live a quiet life, minding your own business and working with your hands, just as we commanded you before</p>
<p>44. Respectful: Honoring the authority God has placed in my life</p>
<p>1 Thessalonians 5:12-13<br />
Dear brothers and sisters, honor those who are your leaders in the Lord&#8217;s work. They work hard among you and warn you against all that is wrong. Think highly of them and give them your wholehearted love because of their work. And remember to live peaceably with each other.</p>
<p>45. Responsible: Knowing and doing what is expected of me</p>
<p>Romans 14:12<br />
Yes, each of us will have to give a personal account to God.</p>
<p>46. Secure: Feeling safe because of God&#8217;s protection</p>
<p>Proverbs 29:25<br />
Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but to trust the Lord means safety.</p>
<p>47. Self-Controlled: Ruling my own life with obedience to the Holy Spirit</p>
<p>I Thessalonians 5:22<br />
Keep away from every kind of evil</p>
<p>48. Sincere: Desiring to do what is right with pure motives</p>
<p>Joshua 24:14<br />
So honor the Lord and serve him wholeheartedly. Put away forever the idols your ancestors worshipped when they lived beyond the Euphrates River and in Egypt. Serve the Lord alone.</p>
<p>49. Submissive: Yielding myself to God&#8217;s guidance through others</p>
<p>Ephesians 5:21<br />
And further, you will submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.</p>
<p>50. Supportive: Giving strength and courage to those with troubles</p>
<p>Galatians 6:2<br />
Share each other&#8217;s troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ.</p>
<p>51. Tactful: Saying and doing the right thing, especially in a difficult situation</p>
<p>Colossians 4:6<br />
Let your conversation be gracious and effective so that you will have the right answer for everyone</p>
<p>52. Temperate: Not being extreme in any way or thing especially with regard to<br />
feelings or appetites</p>
<p>Titus 2:12<br />
And we instructed to turn from godless living and sinful pleasures. We should live in this evil world with self-control, right conduct, and devotion to God.</p>
<p>53. Thankful: Expressing to God and others the ways they have shown me favor<br />
of kindness</p>
<p>I Thessalonians 5:18<br />
No matter what happens, always be thankful, for this is God&#8217;s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus</p>
<p>54. Through: Doing all that should be done to complete the job</p>
<p>Ecclesiastes 9:10<br />
Whatever you do, do well. For when you go to the grave, there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom.</p>
<p>55. Thoughtful: Remembering to think of others and their feelings</p>
<p>Philippians 2:4<br />
Don&#8217;t think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too and what they are doing.</p>
<p>56. Thrifty: Using money wisely according to God&#8217;s principles</p>
<p>Proverbs 14:24<br />
Wealth is a crown for the wise; the effort of fools yields only folly.</p>
<p>57. Tolerant: Being patient with the weaknesses of others</p>
<p>I Thessalonians 5:14<br />
Brothers and sisters, we urge you to warn those who are lazy. Encourage those who are timid. Take tender care of those who are weak. Be patient with everyone.</p>
<p>58. Truthful: Speaking what is true and accurate</p>
<p>Ephesians 4:25<br />
So put away all falsehood and &#8220;tell your neighbor the truth&#8221; because we belong to each other</p>
<p>59. Understanding: The ability to know the meaning and reasoning behind a certain<br />
situation.</p>
<p>Psalms 119:34<br />
Give me understanding and I will obey your law; I will put it into practice with all my heart</p>
<p>60. Wisdom: The ability to make good judgments</p>
<p>I Kings 3:9<br />
Give me an understanding mind so that I can govern your people well and know the difference between right and wrong. For who by himself is able to govern this great nation of yours?&#8221;</p>
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			<media:title type="html">London</media:title>
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		<title>And today I am better than before&#8230;.</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/and-today-i-am-better-than-before/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/11/24/and-today-i-am-better-than-before/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 24 Nov 2008 13:32:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=19</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[As of late, I have come to the realization that my happiness is contingent upon my trust in the Lord. I have trusted Him with every aspect of my life but have failed short of trusting Him with my heart. Today I put unconditional trust in Him that as he clothes me day by day, [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=19&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>As of late, I have come to the realization that my happiness is contingent upon my trust in the Lord. I have trusted Him with every aspect of my life but have failed short of trusting Him with my heart. Today I put unconditional trust in Him that as he clothes me day by day, ensures that I am fed, provides me with a place to live, and allows me to wake up in my right mind (most days) that He will provide me with my heart&#8217;s desire of love. Settling for anything less has become even more unattractive to me and makes me ill at the sheer thought. I am a better woman today than I was before because I realize the value I bring to the world and refused to allow any man or woman undercut that value with inconsiderate, ambivalent, and/or cowardly actions. I refuse to be used for evil because my heart is full of love. I refuse to allow that love to be bruised, battered, and beaten ever again. The loves of the past are just that&#8230;.past loves that are not to be repeated or missed. Lessons learned.</p>
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			<media:title type="html">London</media:title>
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		<title>How the Scrooge stole Christmas&#8230;.</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/11/05/how-the-scrooge-stole-christmas/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/11/05/how-the-scrooge-stole-christmas/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 05 Nov 2008 16:50:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=17</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Last night history was made. Barack Obama was elected the first African American President of the United States. He is the leader of the free world. My heart was overwhelmed with love for him and my country. Hope for what change he will bring. Conviction that he would make us proud. This was my Blck [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=17&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Last night history was made. Barack Obama was elected the first African American President of the United States. He is the leader of the free world. My heart was overwhelmed with love for him and my country. Hope for what change he will bring. Conviction that he would make us proud. This was my Blck Christmas. But my Christmas was plagued by yet another heartbreak that brought me to the realization that I am spiritually dying on the inside. My life is perpetually in shambles and my heart continuously broken. I. give. up. I don&#8217;t want to do this anymore. I can&#8217;t continue to invest myself emotionally into people only to have my feelings bruised and battered. But then what is a life of solitude&#8230;.where you are emotionally disconnected from the rest of the world. I long for someone who is that confidant who can share good and bad times with me&#8230;.but after 27 (almost 28) years on this Earth God has seen fit to let me know that His plans do not include that for me. So what&#8217;s the purpose? That&#8217;s the ultimate question. What is a life of academic and professional success with no one to share it with. Its nothing and worthless. Congratulations, Obama. I am truly sorry I will remember this day in history&#8230;.your day&#8230;.as the day I would rather not wake up in the morning. Good luck in office. I am sure you will do the country proud.</p>
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			<media:title type="html">London</media:title>
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		<title>Feeling Good About YOU!</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/16/feeling-good-about-you/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/16/feeling-good-about-you/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 16 Jun 2008 20:40:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=15</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[  One of my bestfriends shared this with me, I hope you enjoy as much as I did ) One of the most powerful personal programming activities you can engage in is positive self-talk. Be your own cheerleader and talk to yourself positively all of the time. Think About Your Dreams As it happens, the [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=15&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p> </p>
<p><span style="font-size:x-small;"><span style="font-family:'Courier New', Courier, mono;"><span>One of my bestfriends shared this with me, I hope you enjoy as much as I did <img src='http://s1.wp.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_surprised.gif' alt=':o' class='wp-smiley' /> )</span></span></span><br />
One of the most powerful personal programming activities you can engage in is positive self-talk. Be your own cheerleader and talk to yourself positively all of the time.</p>
<p>Think About Your Dreams<br />
As it happens, the average person talks to himself in a negative way. As much as 94 percent of your inner dialogue tends to be about the things you fear, your worries, the people you&#8217;re angry at, your problems, your concerns and so on. You have to consciously keep your words, your inner dialogue, consistent with what you wish to accomplish.</p>
<p>The Most Powerful Antidote<br />
Psychologists have proven that the words, &#8220;I can do it,&#8221; are the antidote to the fear of failure that often holds you back from trying. Repeat these words over and over to yourself whenever you feel fearful or doubtful about anything that you want to attempt. Say very enthusiastically to yourself, &#8220;I can do it, I can do it, I can do it!&#8221; When you start saying, &#8220;I can do it, I can do it,&#8221; you drive that message deep into your subconscious mind. This message lowers your fears and builds your self-confidence.</p>
<p>Make A Million!<br />
Another thing you can say to yourself is, &#8220;I make a million. I make a million.&#8221; Impress that message into your subconscious mind. Whenever you think about your work, say over and over again, &#8220;I&#8217;m the best, I&#8217;m the best, I&#8217;m the best.&#8221; Making any one of these three statements, or anything that is positive makes you feel good about yourself and causes you to be more motivated. You become more focused, more determined. Wealthy, successful people have a continuous inner dialogue that is positive and constructive and uplifting and consistent with their goals and objectives.</p>
<p>Feed Your Mind Continually<br />
Feed your mind from morning to night with words, pictures, information and ideas consistent with your goals for financial success. Develop the habit of thinking positively and confidently about wealth accumulation. Read stories, books and articles about other successful people. Think about how you could be like them. Visualize yourself, imagine, fantasize, pretend in your mind that you are like the kind of people that you admire and respect and want to be like.</p>
<p>Select A Role Model<br />
Psychologists have proven that role models are essential for magnetizing your mind with the qualities and characteristics that you wish to develop in yourself. Pick a person that you admire. Whenever you face any kind of difficult situation, ask yourself, how would this person act in this situation? What would this person do? How would this person behave? You&#8217;ll find that when you think about how someone you admire might behave, your own thinking becomes better and you tend to act at your very best.</p>
<p>Become An Expert<br />
Read everything you can find about your business. Become an expert in your field. The more you learn about your profession, your trade and your craft, the more confident you will become that you can do well in it.</p>
<p>Action Exercises<br />
Here are two things you can do to put yourself on the new mental diet for financial success:</p>
<p>First, repeat to yourself, over and over again, the wonderful words &#8220;I can do it! I can do it! I can do it!&#8221; Whenever you are anticipating any new goal or opportunity. This affirmation builds your self-confidence and conditions you for success.</p>
<p>Second, monitor your mental diet the way you would your physical diet. Be sure that you feed yourself throughout the day with positive stories, words, pictures and conversations about the things you want to have in your life. Refuse to read, watch, listen to or discuss things that are negative or depressing. This will make a tremendous difference in how you feel and how you act.</p>
<p> </p>
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			<media:title type="html">London</media:title>
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		<title>I feel cheated&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/15/i-feel-cheated/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/15/i-feel-cheated/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 15 Jun 2008 20:39:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=13</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I feel hurt. I feel cheated. I feel mislead. I feel like the entire situation is unfair. I feel like Aladdin got the perfect ending and left me with emptiness and then wants me t be happy for him. He wants it all. While I have nothing. And its not fair. Its not fair that [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=13&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I feel hurt. I feel cheated. I feel mislead. I feel like the entire situation is unfair. I feel like Aladdin got the perfect ending and left me with emptiness and then wants me t be happy for him. He wants it all. While I have nothing. And its not fair. Its not fair that someone so selfish gets exactly what they want while I get zilch. I feel betrayed. He lied to me about his feelings for me and wrapped me in a blanket of false security. I want to be ok with him one day&#8230;but months later&#8230; that day still isn&#8217;t here. I&#8217;m sure he could care less while I&#8217;ve obsessed over this for days. Its so unfair. I feel jealous.</p>
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			<media:title type="html">London</media:title>
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		<title>The Virtuous Woman</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/14/the-virtuous-woman/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/14/the-virtuous-woman/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 14 Jun 2008 03:09:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=12</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Proverbs 31:10-31 The last part of Proverbs 31, beginning with verse 10, consists of 22 verses, each verse beginning with a different letter of the Hebrew alphabet (in order of the Hebrew letters).  The same thing is found in some of the Psalms and may have been used as an aid in memorizing Scripture. The [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=12&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div></div>
<h1>Proverbs 31:10-31</h1>
<p align="justify">The last part of Proverbs 31, beginning with verse 10, consists of 22 verses, each verse beginning with a different letter of the Hebrew alphabet (in order of the Hebrew letters).  The same thing is found in some of the Psalms and may have been used as an aid in memorizing Scripture. The most well-known alphabetical Psalm is Psalm 119 where there are 22 alphabetical sections of eight verses each.  In the Hebrew text of Proverbs 31, each verse is also clearly divided into two parts (for example, in verse 10&#8212;Part 1:  Who can find a virtuous woman?   Part 2:  For her price is far above rubies).  This same two-part format is found in all these verses (the only exception might be verse 15 which seems to be divided into three parts).</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:10</h1>
<h2>Who can find a virtuous woman?</h2>
<p align="justify">The first part of verse 10 literally reads, &#8220;Who can find <strong>a woman of strength</strong>?&#8221;   The term &#8220;virtuous&#8221; is from a noun meaning strength, efficiency, ability.  Here it refers to <strong>strength of character</strong> as well as moral strength and firmness. </p>
<p align="justify">In Exodus 18:21 we find the expression used of men.  Moses was to find &#8220;able men&#8221; (lit.&#8211;men of strength) such as fear God, men of truth, hating covetousness.  In light of this verse we can say that a virtuous man is one who fears God, loves truth and hates sin.  Moses was to look for and find such men, and the implication is that such men were not easy to find.  The expression is also used in 1 Kings 1:42 (&#8220;valiant man&#8221; or &#8220;man of strength) and 1 Kings 1:52 (&#8220;worthy man&#8221; or &#8220;man of strength&#8221;).  In this latter passage (v.52) we learn that the opposite of a virtuous man is a man in whom wickedness is found.  Thus a virtuous man is a man of great moral strength, in whom wickedness is not found.  He is a godly, God-fearing man.  [So also, the virtuous woman is a God-fearing woman--compare Proverbs 31:10 with 31:30].</p>
<p align="justify">In two other places in the Old Testament the expression is used of a virtuous woman.  In Ruth 3:11 it is used of Ruth.  Everyone in the city knew that she was a virtuous woman!  When a woman has strength of character (fears God, loves truth, hates sin), then others will take note and recognize this.  It will be very obvious because it is so unusual.  People are so morally weak and so anemic in character, that when a man or woman of strength shows up it is quite evident to all.   The other place the  term is used is Proverbs 12:4 where we learn that a virtuous woman (lit&#8211;a woman of strength) does not make her husband ashamed.</p>
<h2>For her price is far above rubies</h2>
<p align="justify">She is far more valuable and worth far more than rubies.  The Hebrew term for &#8220;rubies&#8221; may not refer to rubies, but may refer to pink pearls or red coral. There was a pink pearl which was found from a mollusk in the Red Sea which was considered of great value to the ancients.  It is difficult to know exactly which stone or pearl this Hebrew word referred to, but its usage in the OT tells us two things for sure:  1)  It was very valuable (see Proverbs 20:15 and Job 28:18);  2)  It was reddish in color (Lamentations 4:7&#8211;&#8221;ruddy&#8221;).</p>
<p align="justify">Who can find a virtuous woman (a woman of strength)?  She is like a rare gem.  Precious stones are precious and costly because they are so rare. If you could go out along the roadside and collect hundreds of rubies anytime you wanted to, then they would not be worth much.  It is the rare, hard to find gems that are worth so much.  Also, for some reason God made most common stones unattractive but He made most rare stones very beautiful and brilliant and lustrous.  The virtuous woman is a beautiful woman, not necessarily outwardly, but certainly inwardly (see Prov. 31:30).  She is not only a rare gem but a beautiful gem.</p>
<p align="justify">A godly woman is rare and very hard to find.  The same could be said for the godly man.  Number one on the endangered species list is the <em>homosapien godlicus</em>:  &#8220;Help, LORD; for the<strong>godly man</strong> ceaseth; for the faithful fail from among the children of men&#8221; (Psalm 12:1).   There are hardly any such creatures around and the few that do exist will eventually die out!  May God in His infinite grace and mercy be pleased to raise up godly men and women in these difficult and trying days.</p>
<p align="justify">If a young man is looking for a godly woman, how can he find her?  First he should trust God to find her for him.  Second, he must realize that a virtuous woman is not going to want just any man.  She is going to want to find a virtuous man (a man of strength, a man valiant for the truth, a godly servant of Christ).  So if you want to have any chance of finding such a gem, you must be a gem yourself.  Exercise yourself unto godliness.  Learn the fear of the Lord.  Dare to be different.  Dare to not go with the flow of the world, but to be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Rom. 12:2).  Be the kind of a man that the godly woman would be interested in!</p>
<p align="justify">So in this opening verse we have learned that the godly woman is very hard to find.  She is more valuable than a rare gem.  She has an inner beauty and a strength of character and a moral firmness that is lacking in the vast majority of women, even believing women.</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:11</h1>
<h2>The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her</h2>
<p align="justify">Sad to say, this cannot be said of most husbands today.  They cannot trust their wives (and often their wives cannot trust them).  Being able to fully trust your marriage partner is one of the fundamental foundations of a strong God-honoring marriage. </p>
<p align="justify">The term &#8220;husband&#8221; is the common word for husband in the Old Testament. It also means &#8220;lord&#8221; or &#8220;owner.&#8221;  It is also the word that is used of the false god &#8220;Baal.&#8221;</p>
<p align="justify">There are two reasons why the heart of the husband can trust his virtuous wife.  The first reason is found in the second part of verse 11 (&#8220;so that he shall have no need of spoil&#8221;) and the second reason is found in verse 12 (&#8220;she shall do him good and not evil&#8221;).  See discussion that follows.</p>
<h2>So that he shall have no need of spoil</h2>
<p align="justify">&#8220;No need&#8221; is the very same expression found in Psalm 23:1&#8211;&#8221;I shall not want.&#8221;  It means to lack, to be in need, to be lacking, and here and in Psalm 23:1 it is used with the negative:  to not be in need, to not be lacking, to have no need.  If the LORD is my Shepherd, then I shall not be in need because He will supply all my need.  If I have a godly wife, I shall not be in need of spoil.</p>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;spoil&#8221; means &#8220;plunder, booty, spoil.&#8221;  It is often used of booty obtained following a battle as the victorious soldiers would take anything valuable from their defeated foes and thus would GAIN riches from battle. Here in Proverbs 31:11 the word carries the secondary meaning of &#8220;GAIN.&#8221; [It is certainly not suggesting that if his wife was not virtuous that he would need to go to battle, slay the enemy and take of their spoil!]  &#8220;He shall have no need of GAIN&#8221; because his wife is a tremendous benefit to the family even financially.  She is not a financial liability (as the verses following will amply illustrate).  She manages the home so well and she is so industrious and productive that her efforts result in great GAIN and even PROFIT.</p>
<p align="justify">Sadly today some wives are so slothful and careless that they cause the family to suffer great financial loss.  They go on shopping sprees or incur immense credit card debt or waste countless hours each week engaged in unproductive activities (TV, etc.).  How can her husband safely trust in her? After she has finished destroying the family budget, he has great need of gain considering all that she has lost!</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:12</h1>
<h2>She will do him good, and not evil</h2>
<p align="justify">Her husband can safely trust in her because he does not need to worry about her being a financial liability (v.11) and because he knows that she will do him only good, and not evil.  &#8220;Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor from the LORD&#8221; (Prov. 18:22).  Of course, the man must find the right kind of wife.  Job&#8217;s wife was a curse who only added to his trials (Job 2:9-10).  Some men find &#8220;a crown to their head&#8221; while others find &#8220;rottenness to their bones&#8221; (Prov. 12:4).  One of the reasons Proverbs 31:10-31 was written, no doubt, was to help guide men in finding the right kind of wife. The key to finding the right woman, is to look to the Lord in prayer and steadfast trust so that God Himself might be the One who finds her.  God knows who my life partner should be.</p>
<p align="justify">The verb &#8220;will do&#8221; is of interest.  It is not the common Hebrew verb for &#8220;do.&#8221; It means to deal out, to deal fully, to deal bountifully.  At times it even approaches the meaning of &#8220;to reward, to pay back.&#8221;  Let&#8217;s illustrate how it is used.  In 1 Samuel 24:17 David had just spared Saul&#8217;s life even though he easily could have killed his persecutor.  Saul&#8217;s response:  &#8220;Thou art more righteous than I; for thou hast <strong>rewarded</strong> me good, whereas I have <strong>rewarded</strong> thee evil.&#8221;   Saul deserved evil but David dealt with him in a good way.  Saul dished out evil to David but David dished out good to Saul who actually deserved evil.  In Genesis 50:15,17 the term is used of Joseph&#8217;s guilty brothers who remembered what they had done to Joseph:  &#8220;Joseph&#8230;will certainly requite us all the evil which we <strong>did</strong> unto him&#8230;So shall ye say unto Joseph, Forgive, I pray thee now, the trespass of thy brethren, and their sin; for they <strong>did </strong>unto thee evil.&#8221;  They dealt out and dished out evil to Joseph but he did not pay them back in the same way.  Joseph saw God&#8217;s good and sovereign hand in it all (Gen. 50:20).  </p>
<p align="justify">This verb is also used of the LORD who <strong>deals  bountifully</strong> with his servants. See Psalm 13:6; 116:7; 119:17; 142:7.</p>
<p align="justify">The virtuous woman deals out to her husband that which is good.  She dishes out to him and serves him that which is good and not evil.  She wants only God&#8217;s highest and best for him.   Her life and her deeds are a constant BENEFIT to her husband, and a BLESSING. </p>
<h2>All the days of her life</h2>
<p align="justify">In doing good to her husband she is consistent.  She doesn&#8217;t serve him that which is good one day and that which is evil the next day.  Her husband can count on her to do him good and to be a blessing to him.  He can count on her to do this today, five days from now, one year from now, 10 years from now, all the days of her life.  She is not up and down, hot and cold.  Her godliness is marked with consistency. </p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:13</h1>
<h2>She seeketh wool and flax</h2>
<p align="justify">Wool, of course, is the wavy or curly undercoat of a sheep which can be woven into a nice garment or fabric.  Even today we wear wool sweaters or mittens to protect us against the cold.</p>
<p align="justify">Flax was a fibrous plant used in spinning. The fibers can be drawn out and twisted into yarn or threat for the manufacture of linen.   The most famous flax was grown under ideal conditions in Egypt.  There was no better linen than the &#8220;fine linen of Egypt.&#8221;  This is one reason why the seventh plague was so terrible. This judgment involved hail stones mixed with fire and it &#8220;smote every herb of the field&#8221; (Exodus 9:25), totally destroying, among other things, the flax crop.  From flax can be made a variety of materials from course canvas, to rugged sails for ships or even a thin, delicate scarf.</p>
<p align="justify">The godly woman &#8220;seeks&#8221; these two basic ingredients for the making of clothes and garments.  The term &#8220;seek&#8221; could mean that she &#8220;selects&#8221; (NIV) the best quality of wool and flax or it could mean that she &#8220;seeks with care&#8221; or &#8220;cares for&#8221; the wool and flax, as the word is used in Deuteronomy 11:12&#8211;&#8221;A land which the LORD thy God <strong>careth for</strong> (seeks!).&#8221;   She carefully collects and gathers and cares for the wool and flax that she will use in making clothes for her household and perhaps for others as well.</p>
<h2>And worketh willingly with her hands</h2>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;willingly&#8221; is the word meaning &#8220;delight, pleasure.&#8221;   She takes great delight in her work.  It is not a laborious and boring chore.  It is a pleasure.  It is enjoyable.  Toil need not be tedious.  It can be a tremendous source of pleasure and satisfaction. </p>
<p align="justify">In our modern, computerized, electronic, entertainment-saturated society we have lost the art of working with our hands.  Women don&#8217;t delight in making clothes with their hands, but instead their delight in shopping for clothes at the mall and thus adversely affecting the family budget.  Instead of learning from mother how to sew and knit and crochet and mend, children are too busy watching TV.  And many mothers do not even know how to do these things and could not teach their children even if they wanted to.  I used to watch my mother spend countless hours knitting and crocheting and sewing, but these things are becoming a lost art.</p>
<p align="justify">The godly woman takes great pleasure in working with her hands and providing clothing for her family.</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:14 </h1>
<h2>She is like the merchants&#8217; ships<br />
She bringeth food from afar</h2>
<p align="justify">In verse 13 she is seeking to provide clothing for her family and in verse 14 she is seeking to provide food for her family.  The Bible teaches us that with food and raiment we can be content (1 Tim. 6:8) and the virtuous women plays a key role, as God&#8217;s instrument, in providing both.</p>
<p align="justify">Notice the simile.  The virtuous woman is compared to the merchants&#8217; ships. Merchants are traders who  buy or sell commodities for profit, and merchants&#8217; ships are filled with items from far countries.  So the godly woman brings in food from afar (from distant places).  The word &#8220;food&#8221; is the common Hebrew word for &#8220;bread&#8221; but it is also used of food in general.</p>
<p align="justify">Does this mean that she travels to far off countries to procure international delicacies for her family?  Very unlikely.  It probably means that she brought in foods from distant lands by trading for them.  She took some of the wondrous garments or clothes that she made with her hands (v.13) and was able to bring them to some merchant men and trade them for food items which had come from afar, even from distant lands. </p>
<p align="justify">Today the wife usually says to her husband, &#8220;Dear, I need some money because I&#8217;m going to town to do our weekly grocery shopping.&#8221;  The virtuous woman said, &#8220;Dear, I&#8217;m going to town but I don&#8217;t need any money because I&#8217;m taking some of the fine linen which I have made and will trade it in for some items of food which you will really enjoy.&#8221;  How can he complain about that?  </p>
<p align="justify">It also seems that she recognized that it would be good for her family to give them great variety in their diet, including international dishes, and not to constantly give them the same foods all the time.  Variety is the spice of life.</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:15</h1>
<h2>She riseth also while it is yet night </h2>
<p align="justify">She is up before the sun, showing that idleness and laziness have no place with her (compare verse 27).  The sluggard (Prov. 6:6-11) should not only go to the ant, but should also go to the virtuous woman to learn a lesson on diligence.  There are great benefits to rising up early.  It is a quiet time free from the noise and distractions of the day.  It is an ideal time to spend with the Lord in quiet meditation and prayer, starting the day with Him.  We have the example of our blessed Lord  &#8220;And in the morning, <strong>rising up a great while before day</strong>, he went out, and departed into a solitary place, and there prayed (Mark 1:35).   And the Psalmist, &#8220;In the morning shall my prayer come before thee&#8221; (Psalm 88:13).</p>
<div>
<table border="2" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="11" width="79%" bgcolor="#CCFFCC">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td width="50%">Did you meet the Master,<br />
At the break of day,<br />
Before your mind was clouded<br />
With your work or play?</td>
<td width="50%">Yes, I met the Master, <br />
In the secret place.<br />
Oh! the blessed comfort<br />
When He giveth Grace.</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
</div>
<p align="justify">Rising up early also allows you to get a good start on the day.  Have you ever slept in late and then by the time you really get going it seems that half the day is gone and you have accomplished very little?  Sprinters know that the most important part of the race is how they start the race (how they get off the starting blocks).  The key is beginning well.  May God help us to begin our days well, beginning the day early with God, getting a good early start on the tasks and duties that demand our attention and diligence.</p>
<h2>She giveth meat (food) to her household, and a portion to her maidens</h2>
<p align="justify">One of the reasons she rose up so early was to provide food for her household.  When the father and children get up they are greeted with a hearty, home-cooked breakfast!   Nutritionists consider breakfast the most important meal of the day, nourishing the body that has not had any food for many hours (the &#8220;breaking of the fast,&#8221; that is, &#8220;breakfast&#8221;) and providing energy for the toil of the day.  The virtuous woman makes sure that her family gets off to a good nutritional start.  This term &#8220;food&#8221; (translated by some as &#8220;game&#8221;) is also used in Psalm 111:5 of God&#8217;s gracious provision of food for those who fear Him.</p>
<p align="justify">Her maidens are her female servants.  This virtuous woman was blessed with a large household that included female maids or servants.  She did not live in a poor house.  We are reminded that under the Old Testament economy, the Israelites who honored and feared the Lord were promised not only spiritual blessings but also material blessings, and certainly the woman described in Proverbs 31 had both.</p>
<p align="justify">One might think that this virtuous woman could command her female servants and tell them rise up early and prepare the breakfast meal and have it ready for her entire family.  But we are told that she gives a portion of food to her maidens.  Not only does this speak of her kindness to those working under her, but it also shows that she was unwilling to demand of others what she herself was unwilling to do.  Workers and servants will greatly respect a superior who is willing to &#8220;get his hands dirty&#8221; and do some of the very tasks which he might require of them.   The term &#8220;portion&#8221; is used in that wonderful passage found in Job 23:12&#8211;&#8221;Neither have I gone back from the commandment of His lips; I have esteemed the words of His mouth more than my <strong>portion of food</strong>.&#8221;</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:16</h1>
<h2>She considereth a field, and buyeth it.</h2>
<p align="justify">The verb &#8220;considereth&#8221; is from a verb which often is used to describe the wicked who <strong>devise</strong> evil or are <strong>actively</strong> plotting evil.  Here are some examples:</p>
<p align="justify">&#8220;The wicked <strong>plotteth</strong> against the just, and gnasheth upon him with his teeth&#8221; (Psalm 37:12). &#8220;While they took counsel together against me, they <strong>devised</strong> to take away my life&#8221; (Psalm 31:13b).  &#8220;And now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have <strong>imagined</strong> to do&#8221; (Gen. 11:6b).  In this last passage the people of Babel considered in their minds all kinds of evil and their evil plots would have come to fruition had not God confused their tongues and scattered them.</p>
<p align="justify">In Psalm 17:3 this same verb is used of determining a course of action:  &#8220;I am <strong>purposed</strong> that my mouth shall not transgress&#8221; (Psalm 17:3).</p>
<p align="justify">When wicked men devise evil they often will put a lot of though and planning into it.  We can think of the horrific terrorist attacks against the World Trade Center and the Pentagon on 9/11/01.  These successful attacks were the fruit of enormous planning and premeditation.  It was a very carefully thought out operation.</p>
<p align="justify">The godly woman <strong>considers</strong> a field (a plot of land in open country).  She doesn&#8217;t do this rashly or upon a sudden impulse, but she has given very careful thought to the matter. She has a plan for her family and she carefully thinks about what she needs.  She decides that a prosperous vineyard would be beneficial to all, and thus she decides upon a field that would be suitable.</p>
<p align="justify">&#8220;She <strong>buys</strong> it.&#8221;  Literally, she <strong>takes</strong> it. She acquires the field, probably by purchasing it.  The fact that she buys a field indicates that the godly woman was involved in financial decisions relating to the family and involved in financial transactions.  From what we know about this godly woman, she did not act independently of her husband.  We know that the heart of her husband did safely trust in her (v.11), which he would not be the case if his wife was running around purchasing all kinds of things without his knowledge!   The godly wife, under the headship of her husband, can play a significant role in managing family finances.  Some wives are very good at keeping a checkbook and managing the family budget, and it would be to the advantage of the family for the husband to delegate this responsibility to her.</p>
<p align="justify">How many women buy all kinds of things on the spur of the moment without giving the matter careful thought and deliberation?  As she races out to the shopping mall with her friends, can her husband safely trust in her?</p>
<h2>With the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.</h2>
<p align="justify">The purpose of the field was to provide a place for a vineyard so that the family and others could enjoy the fruit of the vine.  The fruit of her hands signifies the result of her labor.  To cultivate a field and to  maintain a vineyard requires much labor.  The vineyard was the fruit of her loving toil.</p>
<p align="justify">Before we buy something we need to count the cost.  Before you buy a field, you need to ask, &#8220;Am I willing to work the field?&#8221;  Many things that we purchase require a good bit of maintenance, and if we are unwilling to provide the labor that is needed for the maintenance, then the purchase is probably unwise. [Think of people who rashly procure a pet, not realizing all the time and effort that is required to properly take care of the animal.] When the godly woman planned for the purchase of the field, she also calculated the amount of toil that would be needed to maintain the vineyard.</p>
<p align="justify">The &#8220;fruit of her hands&#8221; could also be understood in another way, as &#8220;the fruit of her earnings.&#8221;  That is, with the fruit of her hands (see verse 13) she was able to earn enough money to purchase and plant a vineyard. Perhaps she employed her servants (maidens, v.15) to work the field or to help her work the field.</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:17</h1>
<h2>She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms, <br />
 </h2>
<p align="justify">Inner strength and a tenacious trust in God translates into outer strength and physical vitality and vigor.  The &#8220;loins&#8221; are regarded as the seat of strength (see 1 Kings 12:10; Nahum 2:1).  It refers to the abdominal or hip region of the body (the mid-section). It is the region of strength and procreative power.</p>
<p align="justify">&#8220;To gird&#8221; means to encircle or bind with a flexible band or girdle (belt). In Bible times both men and women wore outer robes or tunics. If the tunic was ungirded it would interfere with a person&#8217;s ability to walk freely. The Bible often makes symbolic use of the girdle. Jesus said, &#8220;Let your loins be girded about&#8221; (Luke 12:35). In other words, &#8220;Be as men who have a long race to run; gather up the folds of your flowing robes, and fasten them with your girdle; that nothing may keep you back or impede your steps.&#8221;  In Bible language, &#8220;to be girded&#8221; means &#8220;to be ready for action.&#8221;  &#8220;For thou hast girded me with strength unto the battle&#8221; (Psalm 18:39).  [See Fred Wight, <em>Manners and Customs of Bible Lands</em>, page 93].</p>
<p align="justify">The virtuous woman has a reservoir of inner strength which is able to energize her and enable her to accomplish physical tasks which require a great amount of physical strength.  She is not weakened by sloth or laziness but she is a wonderful example of diligence and industry.  George Lawson describes her in this way:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">As rust gathers on metals that are seldom used, so sluggishness of disposition contracts a rust on the powers of the body and mind; and idle persons by degrees realize those excuses for their conduct which were at first mere shams. The virtuous woman is of a very different temper. She declines not any part of her duty through aversion to toil; and by exerting her strength with a cheerful mind she improves it. Her labors give her health and vigor, and alacrity for new labors; so that she can with great ease and tranquility go through those duties which appear impossibilities to other women.</span></p>
</blockquote>
<h1>Proverbs 31:18</h1>
<h2>She perceiveth that her merchandise is good;<br />
 </h2>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;perceiveth&#8221; is the Hebrew word that means &#8220;taste.&#8221;  Literally, she tastes that her gain is good. It is the same word that is found in Psalm 34:9, &#8220;O <strong>taste</strong> and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.&#8221;  God&#8217;s goodness must be tasted; it must be personally experienced.  Only those who have truly trusted Him have tasted of His goodness and experienced God for themselves.</p>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;gain&#8221; means profit, traffic, gain received from traffic or trade.  The word is found twice in Proverbs 3:14, &#8220;Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding. For the <strong>merchandise</strong> of it is better than the <strong>merchandise</strong> of silver, and the gain thereof than fine gold&#8221; (verses 13-14).</p>
<p align="justify">The godly woman purchased a field, planted a vineyard, and gave herself to this ambitious endeavor with great strength (verses 16-17).  In verse 18 she is experiencing the rewards of her labor. She comes to find (taste) how profitable her industry is by the experience resulting from the sale of its product.  She sees that her trading is profitable.  She is reaping what she sowed by her diligent industry, and she is finding it to be a good harvest. She is reaping the rewards of hard work.  She is seeing the results of the labors of her hands.  She learns that success results from her labors and she reaps the fruits of hard work.</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">Her merchandise is known to be good, and brings a ready market and a good price; and her knowledge of this is a sufficient reward of itself for her toils; for when the lazy are perpetually uneasy by their reflections on their own conduct, the consciousness of having done her duty, and the prospect of the advantages arising from it, are a constant source of satisfaction and cheerfulness to the virtuous woman (<em>Commentary on Proverbs</em>, George Lawson, p. 564)<em>.</em></span></p>
</blockquote>
<h2>Her candle (lamp) goeth not out by night.</h2>
<p align="justify">Homes in Bible times were illuminated at night by olive oil lamps.  The virtuous woman&#8217;s lamp did not go out at night, that is, it was not quenched or extinguished (see 1 Sam. 3:3).  What was she doing at night?  Probably the activity mentioned in verse 19 (hand spinning). Here was a woman who worked day and night with amazing diligence and fortitude.  We might say she &#8220;burned the midnight oil.&#8221;  If you were to pass by her house late at night you would see that her light would still be on.  We wonder when this woman ever slept because in these verse she is working late at night and in verse 15 she rises while it is yet night.  The fact that she rises indicates that she did get some sleep.  We have the expression, &#8220;early to bed, early to rise,&#8221; but she seems to have been in the habit of &#8220;late to bed, early to rise.&#8221; </p>
<p align="justify">Some women are up late at night pursuing questionable activities, but then they sleep through half the day, exchanging inferior lamp light for superior sunlight.  But the godly woman is diligent both day and night, and is able to get the necessary sleep, but not to overindulge.  The poverty mentioned in Proverbs 6:9-11 will not be her portion.</p>
<p align="justify">Believers need to evaluate their nighttime activities to make sure that they are pleasing to the Lord and profitable for eternity.  During the day we normally have our duties and our schedule&#8211;things we need to do and places we need to be.  Our time is usually well accounted for during the day.  But after sunset is usually the part of the day when we have &#8220;free time,&#8221; and it is important to recognize that this time belongs to the Lord.  May we be about our Father&#8217;s business!  And then when we finally lie down on our beds, our sleep will be sweet. </p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:19</h1>
<h2>She layeth her hands to the spindle, <br />
and her hands hold the distaff.</h2>
<p align="justify">She knew how to use her hands with skill in providing clothing for her family and perhaps others.  Described in this verse is a very ancient method of spinning in the days before the spinning wheel even existed. The DISTAFF was a staff used for holding the flax, tow or wool which would be spun into  thread by means of the SPINDLE.  The spindle would turn and twist the fibers into threads.  [See the discussion of wool and flax under verse 13.]</p>
<p align="justify">The SPINDLE was a round stick with tapered ends used to form and twist the yarn in hand spinning. The spindle and the distaff are the most ancient of all instruments used in the craft of spinning. About 8 to 10 inches long, spindles were used to guide the thread as it was fashioned into cloth. The weaver sometimes turned the spindle by rolling it across her thigh. </p>
<p align="justify">The wool or flax was wound on the distaff, which was stuck upright in the ground or held under the arm. The spindle, which had a circular rim to steady it when revolving, was attached to the thread being drawn out from the distaff.  By rotating the spindle, the spinner twisted the thread.  An example of hand spinning is found in the ancient book of Exodus:  &#8220;And all the women that were wise hearted <strong>did spin with their hands</strong>, and brought <strong>that which they had spun</strong>, both of blue, and of purple, and of scarlet, and of fine linen. And all the women whose heart stirred them up in wisdom <strong>spun goats&#8217; hair</strong>&#8221; (Exodus 35:25-26).</p>
<p align="justify">It is very sad that the craft of making clothes is being learned by fewer and fewer girls today.  So many young women have no skill when it comes to sewing, knitting or crocheting.  They never learned these skills at home or in school.  Why is such a skill even necessary if one can visit the nearby mall and purchase any item of clothing that is desired?   Young women today, in many cases, hardly know how to prepare meals.  Even cooking family meals is becoming a lost art.  How many know how to make a cake from scratch?  Many families eat out frequently or order food that can be brought into the home.  How many families take time to sit down at a meal together around the table?  Families don&#8217;t eat together, don&#8217;t pray together, don&#8217;t read together, and we wonder why families are disintegrating.</p>
<p align="justify">If a woman&#8217;s hands are idle and if she is not engaged in worthwhile, constructive pursuits, then watch out!    &#8220;Idle hands are the devil&#8217;s tools&#8221; and &#8220;If the devil can catch a man (or woman) idle, he&#8217;ll set him (or her) to work.&#8221;</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:20</h1>
<h2>She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; <br />
yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.</h2>
<p align="justify">Compare an earlier verse in the same Proverb:  &#8220;Plead the cause of the poor and needy&#8221; (verse 9).</p>
<p align="justify">Verse 20 is an example of parallelism that is found so often in Hebrew poetry. In these two phrases parallel ideas are set forth, with the second phrase saying basically the same thing as the first phrase, with only minor variations.  Both phrases emphasize the fact that the virtuous woman has compassion toward the poor and needy and she shows her compassion with concrete deeds of mercy.  She loves the poor, not in word or in tongue only, but also in deed and in truth (1 John 3:16-18).</p>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;poor&#8221; means &#8220;poor, afflicted, humble.&#8221;   It is used of those who are physically and materially poor as in Proverbs 31:20, and it is also used of believers who recognize their spiritual poverty and bankruptcy (&#8220;I am poor and needy&#8221;&#8211;see Psalm 40:17; 70:5; 109:22; 34:6).  No one can make progress in his spiritual life until he realizes how desperately needy he really is and recognizes that only the Lord can supply that which is needed.</p>
<p align="justify">God&#8217;s people are to have a heart of compassion for those who are physically and materially poor and needy.  In the law, God told the Israelites that the gleanings from their vineyards and fields should be left for the poor of the land (Lev. 19:10; 23:22). The godly woman of Proverbs 31 faithfully obeyed the following command: &#8220;For the <strong>poor</strong> shall never cease out of the land: therefore I command thee, saying, Thou shalt open thine hand wide unto thy brother, <strong>to thy poor</strong>, and to thy needy, in thy land.&#8221; (Deut. 15:11).  Early in Proverbs 31, believers are encouraged to plead the cause of the poor (verse 9).   In Proverbs 14:21 a benediction is pronounced upon those who show compassion on the poor and help them: &#8220;He that despiseth his neighbour sinneth: but he that hath mercy on the poor, happy is he.&#8221; </p>
<p align="justify">In studying this Hebrews word which is translated &#8220;poor&#8221; in Proverbs 31:20, I was surprised to find it used of our blessed Lord Himself during the days of his humiliation:  &#8220;Rejoice greatly, O daughter of Zion; shout, O daughter of Jerusalem: behold, thy King cometh unto thee: he is just, and having salvation; <strong>lowly</strong>, and riding upon an ass, and upon a colt the foal of an ass&#8221; (Zechariah 9:9).  The word &#8220;lowly&#8221; is the same Hebrew word as &#8220;poor&#8221; in Proverbs 31:20.  We are reminded of our Lord&#8217;s amazing condescension:  &#8220;For ye know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that, though he was rich, yet <strong>for your sakes he became poor</strong>, that ye through <strong>his poverty</strong> might be rich&#8221; (2 Cor. 8:9).</p>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;needy&#8221; at the end of verse 20 means &#8220;one who is in need, in want; one who is lacking.&#8221;  When a person lacks basic material necessities such as food and clothing, then he is considered POOR, and hence the word is a synonym for POOR.</p>
<p align="justify">The word is used to describe the spiritual condition of God&#8217;s people.  Every believer needs to recognize his spiritual bankruptcy:  &#8220;I am poor and <strong>needy</strong>.&#8221;  See Psalm 40:17; 70:5; 86:1; 109:22.  What we need, only God can supply.  When He supplies that which we lack, then we are rich indeed.</p>
<p align="justify">The key Old Testament passage instructing the Israelites on their responsibilities toward the poor and needy is found in Deuteronomy 15:7-11:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">7: If there be among you a poor man of one of thy brethren within any of thy gates in thy land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not harden thine heart, nor shut thine hand from thy poor brother:<br />
8: But thou shalt open thine hand wide unto him, and shalt surely lend him sufficient for his need, in that which he wanteth. <br />
9: Beware that there be not a thought in thy wicked heart, saying, The seventh year, the year of release, is at hand; and thine eye be evil against thy poor brother, and thou givest him nought; and he cry unto the LORD against thee, and it be sin unto thee.<br />
10: Thou shalt surely give him, and thine heart shall not be grieved when thou givest unto him: because that for this thing the LORD thy God shall bless thee in all thy works, and in all that thou puttest thine hand unto.<br />
11: For the poor shall never cease out of the land: therefore I command thee, saying, Thou shalt open thine hand wide unto thy brother, to thy poor, and to thy needy, in thy land.</p></blockquote>
<p align="justify">Notice that they were not to shut their hand, but open their hand wide unto the poor person (verses 7,8,11), just as the godly woman stretched out her hand to the poor and reached forth her hand to the needy (Prov. 31:20). </p>
<p align="justify">In Job 29:16 Job said, &#8220;I was a father to the poor (needy).&#8221;  Just as a father takes care of the material needs of his children, so Job took care of the material needs of the poor. See also Job 30:25 where we see Job&#8217;s heart of compassion for the poor.</p>
<p align="justify">Proverbs 17:5 teaches that the person who is merciful to the poor and needy is the person who honors God.  The <em>Amplified Bible</em> renders it this way, &#8220;He who oppresses the poor reproaches, mocks and insults his Maker, but he who is kind and merciful to the needy honors Him.&#8221; </p>
<p align="justify">As we consider our responsibility to the poor today (see 1 John 3:17-18; James 2:15-17), some words of caution are necessary.  Don&#8217;t be duped.  A man deceptively begs for money for groceries and ends up spending it on alcohol.  This writer sadly remembers giving a man money for an emergency car repair only to find out later to my horror that it was spent on drugs.  Another might ask for gas money and use it to support some sinful, wicked habit.  Different approaches need to be used.  For example, if a person is truly hungry, sit down with him at the restaurant and as he eats his meal you can share the gospel with him.  If a car repair is really needed, don&#8217;t give the money to the poor man, but to the car mechanic.</p>
<p align="justify">Others posing as poor people routinely go around to churches looking for handouts and financial gifts, but supporting this kind of behavior will not really help the person to be responsible for the long term.  After he profits from you he is off to the next church.  We don&#8217;t want to support irresponsibility. </p>
<p align="justify">In Bible times, the poor and blind and lame depended upon merciful almsgiving in order to survive.  Things are somewhat different in our American society where (whether rightly or wrongly) there are all kinds of government programs to assist the poor and needy, and wise stewardship should take this into account.  Our government is going to spend a great deal of money supporting the poor and needy (and we contribute to this through our taxes), but our government is not going to spend any money on God-honoring missionary efforts.  Also we should always remember that meeting a person&#8217;s physical and material needs does not solve his greatest problem.  If you give a person food, clothing and good housing for his entire life, and then he dies and eventually goes to the lake of fire, what have we really done for this man?  How much better to support Christ-centered mission agencies who have workers who are not only concerned with the material needs of the poor, but are mostly concerned about their spiritual and eternal needs.</p>
<p align="justify">May God give us much wisdom and discernment in how to best meet the needs of those God puts us in contact with.</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:21</h1>
<h2>She is not afraid of the snow for her houshold;<br />
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.</h2>
<p align="justify">Snow in Palestine is not common and when it does snow it rarely reaches any great depth.  Some winters snow may not be seen at all. &#8220;A fall of snow in the rainy season of winter is not rare in Palestine&#8230;and is sometimes accompanied with freezing cold&#8221; (Keil &amp; Delitzsch).  The Bible only records one instance where snow fell:  &#8220;And Benaiah the son of Jehoiada, the son of a valiant man, of Kabzeel, who had done many acts, he slew two lionlike men of Moab: he went down also and slew a lion in the midst of a pit <strong>in time of snow</strong>&#8221; (2 Sam. 23:20).</p>
<p align="justify">The virtuous woman, always concerned about the welfare of her family, is not afraid of the snow.  Snow is here a symbol of the cold that accompanies it. She is not afraid of the cold because she has made preparations ahead of time to dress her family in warm clothing.  &#8220;Household&#8221; may also include servants.</p>
<p align="justify">Her household was &#8220;clothed with scarlet.&#8221;   The scarlet color (compare Isaiah 1:18 and Joshua 2:18 where the same word is used) of itself did nothing to warm them.  &#8220;The scarlet clothing is of wool, which as such preserves warmth, and, as high-coloured, appears at the same time dignified (2 Sam. 1:24)&#8221; (Keil &amp; Delitzsch).  Thus they were protected by the wool and the scarlet provided ornamentation.  &#8220;Scarlet&#8221; is &#8220;obtained from the Tola, a cochineal-like insect, which, being crushed, produces a fine deep red, or rich crimson dye, much admired by the Orientals. It is the &#8216;worm&#8217; of Psalm 22:6, to which our Lord likens Himself, He who was bruised and slain that all His redeemed might be clothed in splendor for eternity&#8221; (Ironside).</p>
<p align="justify">One lesson here is that the children of godly parents do not need to be dressed in drab and dull clothing.  Drabness and dullness of apparel does not add to one&#8217;s spirituality. There seems to be an allowance for clothing that is colorful and attractive.  At the same time dress should be modest and not unnecessarily draw attention to SELF or to one&#8217;s body.</p>
<p align="justify"><em><strong>Note</strong></em>:  The LXX and Vulgate translate &#8220;scarlet&#8221; as &#8220;double-garments&#8221; or &#8220;doubly-clothed.&#8221;  It is from a different Hebrew word which is very close in appearance to the Hebrew word for &#8220;scarlet.&#8221;  See <em>Unger&#8217;s Commentary on the Old Testament</em>.  This meaning would make sense with respect to the cold of winter.</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:22</h1>
<h2>She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; <br />
her clothing is silk and purple.</h2>
<p align="justify">&#8220;She makes coverings for herself&#8221; (NASB).  Apparently these were coverings which she made for her bed.  The only other place in the Old Testament where this Hebrew word &#8220;coverings&#8221; is found is Proverbs 7:16 where it is clearly referring to coverings for a bed:  &#8220;I have decked my bed with <strong>coverings</strong> of tapestry.&#8221;  The virtuous woman took time to decorate and adorn her bedroom with beautiful bedspreads, pillows, etc.</p>
<p align="justify">Her clothing is attractive and beautiful, of the finest material.  &#8220;Silk&#8221; refers not to silk as we know it today, but to the &#8220;fine linen of Egypt&#8221; which has already been discussed (see under verse 13).  The modern translations render it &#8220;fine linen.&#8221;</p>
<p align="justify">&#8220;The purple was manufactured by the Phoenicians from a marine mollusk (shellfish). The shell was broken in order to give access to a small gland which was removed and crushed. The crushed gland gives a milky fluid that becomes red or purple on exposure to the air. Piles of these broken shells still remain on the coast at Sidon and Tyre&#8221; (<em>The International Standard Bible Encyclopaedia</em>, Vol. IV, p. 2509). Purple was prized by the ancients and exported far and wide. &#8220;Great labor was required to extract the purple dye, and thus only royalty and the wealthy could afford the resulting richly colored garments&#8221; (<em>Unger&#8217;s Bible Dictionary</em>, p. 904). A total of 250,000 mollusks was required to make one ounce of the dye, which helps us to understand how valuable this dye was (<em>Nelson&#8217;s New Illustrated Bible Dictionary</em>, p. 288). Purple cloth was used in the furnishings of the tabernacle (Exodus 25:4), in Solomon&#8217;s temple (2 Chron. 2:14; 3:14) and in the high priest&#8217;s dress (Exodus 25:4; 26:21).  It was a royal garment worn by kings (Judges 8:26).  It was a symbol of luxury and wealth, worn by the rich man of Luke 16:19 and by the luxurious harlot woman of Revelation 18:16.  In Mark 15:17,20 our Saviour was mockingly dressed in purple when a kingly robe was put around Him.</p>
<p align="justify">What is the meaning of this verse?   The virtuous woman did not dress in a shabby manner.  She was industrious and enterprising, and she was able to purchase the finest materials, and with her own hands make the finest of garments.  She did not consider it a mark of spirituality to go around looking impoverished, dilapidated, and threadbare.  Rather, as was often true under the former dispensation, material prosperity was a sign of God&#8217;s blessing, and was not to be despised.  She wore expensive clothing, royal clothing, to match her regal and godly character. Her outward garments of beauty and splendor matched her inner beauty. &#8220;The virtuous wife is robed in what bespeaks her true character and dignity&#8221; (Ironside).  She was not vain or arrogant and she well understood that external beauty fades (as we will see in verse 30). She was not snobbish in the way she dressed. She understood that the most important clothing was the adorning of the inner man: &#8220;strength and honor are her clothing.&#8221;  </p>
<p align="justify">It is important to remember that the wearing of costly garments did not come at the expense of her family or the poor, nor did it interfere with any of her God-given duties:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">If the virtuous woman has coverings of tapestry for her house, she makes them herself; if she is clothed with silk (or fine linen, as it may be rendered) and purple, she earns it by her labors and good management. She does not starve her charity by her finery, nor spend upon her dress that which might support a poor family, and she does not reckon herself superior to the duties of a wife, nor exempted by wearing silk and purple from using her spindle and distaff.  From all this it appears that the inspired writer allows the use of costly array to none but those who can afford it in a full consistency with the duties which they owe to their families, to the poor, and to all men (<em>Commentary on Proverbs</em>, George Lawson, pages 566-567).</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">The temple in the Old Testament was quite elaborate and beautifully adorned, and this adornment included fine linen and purple.  As believers our bodies are the temple of God (1 Cor. 6:19-20).  Should not our &#8220;temple&#8221; express something of the Lord?   &#8220;But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price&#8221; (1 Pet. 3:4).  &#8220;That they may adorn the doctrine of God, our Savior, in all things&#8221; (Tit. 2:10).   Dressing well, both inwardly and outwardly, is a virtue, not a vice.</p>
<p align="center"><strong>The Godly Woman and Costly Array</strong></p>
<p align="justify">The godly woman of Proverbs 31 was dressed in costly array.  In 1 Timothy 2:9 Christian woman are instructed not to adorn themselves in costly array.  How do we explain this apparent contradiction?  Is it wrong for a believing woman today to go out and buy an expensive dress?  Should she instead only shop at thrift stores where she can spend a minimal amount on necessary attire?</p>
<p align="justify">In the Old Testament, great wealth and godliness were not incompatible.  Abraham had tremendous wealth, as did David and Solomon, and they were not condemned for possessing riches.  They were condemned for setting their heart on their riches (Psalm 62:10). Wealthy believers in the New Testament era, though not extinct, are harder to find.  It is not easy to amass wealth while being persecuted by a Christ-hating world.  Those who are rich are not condemned for their riches, but told not to trust in them (1 Tim. 6:17) and to be generous in the distribution of them (1 Tim. 6:18).</p>
<p align="justify">Homer Kent explains that the passage is 1 Timothy 2:9 does not forbid the wearing of expensive clothes:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">It should be clear that Paul is not forbidding the wearing of any gold or pearls or expensive garments, any more than Peter in a similar passage was forbidding the wearing of clothes (1 Pet. 3:3-4).  But those things are not to be the means whereby the Christian woman makes herself attractive to other Christians.  Good taste should always prevail and display for vanity&#8217;s sake is out of place (<em>The Pastoral Epistles</em>, pages 111-112).</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">R. C. H. Lenski agrees:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">Paul is not insisting on drab dress.  Even this may be worn with vanity; the very drabness may be made a display.  Each according to her station in life: the queen not being the same as her lady-in-waiting, the latter not the same as her noble mistress.  Each with due propriety as modesty and propriety will indicate to her both when attending divine services and when appearing in public elsewhere (<em>The Interpretation of St. Paul&#8217;s Epistles to the Colossians, to the Thessalonians, to Timothy, to Titus and to Philemon</em>, p. 560).</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">There were certain women in Paul&#8217;s day who would flaunt their wealth and draw attention to themselves by wearing expensive clothes.</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">The expensive dresses worn by wealthy women could cost up to 7,000 denarii. Pliny the Elder, a first-century Roman historian, described a dress of Lollia Paulina, wife of the Emperor Caligula, which was worth several hundred thousand dollars by today&#8217;s standards (<em>Natural History</em> 9:58). Dresses of the common women could cost as much as 500-800 denarii.  The average daily wage of a common laborer was one denarius. [A average laborer would need to work two years to be able to purchase such a dress!]  (<em>1 Timothy</em>, John MacArthur, p. 80)</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">Albert Barnes offers a well-reasoned, balanced conclusion:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">It is not supposed that all use of gold or pearls as articles of dress is here forbidden; but the idea is, that the Christian female is not to seek these as the adorning which she desires, or is not to imitate the world in these personal decorations. It may be a difficult question to settle how much ornament is allowable, and when the true line is passed. There is one general rule which is applicable to all, and which might regulate all.  It is, that the true line is passed when more is thought of this external adorning, than of the ornament of the heart.  Any external decoration which occupies the mind more than the virtues of the heart, and which engrosses the time and attention more, we may be certain is wrong. The apparel should be such as not to attract attention, such as shall leave the impression that the heart is not fixed on it.  (<em>Barnes&#8217; Notes</em> on 1 Timothy 2:9).</span></p>
</blockquote>
<h1>Proverbs 31:23</h1>
<h2>Her husband is known in the gates, <br />
When he sitteth among the elders of the land.</h2>
<p align="justify">It is remarkable that in a passage devoted to a godly and virtuous woman we find this verse which says nothing about the woman, but only describes her husband as a prominent leader of the land. It was at the city&#8217;s gates that public business was transacted and cases were decided (the &#8220;gates&#8221; served as the city&#8217;s courtroom). What then do we learn about the virtuous woman from this verse?</p>
<p align="justify">A well-known proverb says it this way:  &#8220;Behind every good man is a good woman.&#8221;  A godly wife contributes greatly to the success and prosperity of her husband.  &#8220;A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband, but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness to his bones&#8221; (Prov. 12:4).  Where would this man be without his godly, industrious, loving, faithful wife?   The value of a godly wife is illustrated from the life of Daniel Webster.  The following is from <em>High Call High Privilege</em> by Gail MacDonald (pages 99-100):</p>
<div>
<table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="9" width="84%" bgcolor="#CCFFCC">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td width="100%">
<p align="justify">By age 31 he had become known as one of America&#8217;s most effective speakers. One of  Webster&#8217;s earlier biographers, Norman Hapgood, assigns much of the great orator&#8217;s success to the quality of his marriage to a woman, Grace Fletcher, whom he married at the age of 26.  Of her the writer says:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">She had the goal of keeping alert to those high principles which her husband held.  Her upright New England faith and sweet loyalty must have been one of the strongest barriers resisting the temptations which lay before the impressionable statesman (Norman Hapgood, <em>Daniel Webster</em>, Boston: Small Maynard &amp; C o, 1899, page 64).</p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">When Grace Fletcher Webster died, Daniel remarried a year later.  The biographer said of Carolyn Roy, his second wife:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">She brought him money and social position and nothing else that could be traced in his life.</p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">Two  years into that second marriage it was said of Webster:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">He steadily declined from a height at which his altering nature could no longer sustain itself.</p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">Daniel Webster began overeating and drinking.  His spending habits soared out of control, and his moral life disintegrated.  By the end of his political life, the man once known for his great integrity had become typed as a political compromiser.  Tragedy mounted upon tragedy, and when he died, he was a beaten and bitter man.</p>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
</div>
<p align="justify">Although a wife can be a tremendous influence for good or for ill, nevertheless the husband is responsible before God to live rightly regardless of the spiritual and moral state of his spouse.  If a man fails spiritually, it is first and foremost his fault.  He must not blame anyone but himself.  His wife may be a negative influence, but he is responsible to follow God, not her.  Think of the example of Job.  His wife said, &#8220;Curse God and die!&#8221; but in spite of her negative influence, Job remained faithful to the Lord.  &#8220;Behind every good man is a good woman&#8221; is not always true.  &#8220;Behind a every good man is a great God!&#8221;</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:24</h1>
<h2>She maketh fine linen and selleth it, <br />
and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.</h2>
<p align="justify">This capable, industrious woman was very enterprising and she operated an amazing home business.  She weaved fine linen garments, a process which has already been discussed (see under verse 13).  Linen garments are mentioned in Judges 14:12-13.  Thirty sheets or thirty linen garments were to be the payment to Samson if the Philistines could not figure out his riddle.  Linen garments are also mentioned as worn by the sinful daughters of Zion in Isaiah 3:23.</p>
<p align="justify">She also manufactured girdles or belts (richly adorned belts?) which had value on the trade market.  This word &#8220;belt&#8221; is used in 2 Samuel 20:8 describing Joab&#8217;s belt which held a sword. The term &#8220;girdle&#8221; as used in the Bible refers to an article of dress encircling the body, usually at the waist.</p>
<p align="justify">She may have enlisted some of her children to help her in this business.  She delivered these goods to the merchants or traders.  These were Phoenician traders, according to the meaning of the Hebrew word.  Phoenicians were known for their trade and commerce and their skill as a seafaring people. Phoenicia&#8217;s two major ports were Tyre and Sidon.</p>
<p align="justify">The virtuous woman provided a source of income for her family through her business. &#8220;When other women impoverish their husbands by buying, she enriches her husband by selling those valuable commodities for which there is a constant demand&#8221; (George Lawson).  &#8220;It is only modern pride and laziness which has introduced the idea that it is inconsistent with the dignity of a fine lady to make profit of her own manufactures.  This virtuous woman, although her husband sits among the elders, does not think it a discredit, but an honor to herself, to make fine linen and girdles for sale; and the wise will praise her on account of it&#8221; (George Lawson).</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:25</h1>
<h2>Strength and honor are her clothing</h2>
<p align="justify">Her wardrobe is remarkable.  These items of clothing are not available at any marketplace or shopping mall.  The LORD Himself provides these garments to the believing heart that is looking to Him.  Such clothes adorn the inner man which is renewed day by day (2 Cor. 4:16).</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">Those ladies who wear gold and jewels dazzle the eyes and draw the regard of ordinary understandings; but how much brighter are the ornaments of a meek and quiet spirit, of strength and honor, which are the constant dress of the woman of virtue! Those who wear costly array rejoice for the present, because they think themselves the object of all men&#8217;s admiration; but they are often preparing future sorrow for themselves by their extravagance, and their neglect of those accomplishments which would gain them respect in old age (George Lawson, <em>Commentary on Proverbs)</em>.</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">Concerning her garment of strength, see the discussion under Proverbs 31:17.  The virtuous woman knew that the LORD was the strength of her life (Psalm 27:1). </p>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;honor&#8221; means splendor, majesty, honor.  In Psalm 8:5 it is used of the honor and majesty conferred by the LORD upon Adam and Eve:  &#8220;and hast crowned him with glory and<strong>honor</strong>.&#8221;  In Psalm 21:5 it is used of the God-given majesty David had as king:  &#8220;honor and <strong>majesty</strong> hast thou laid upon him.&#8221;  </p>
<p align="justify">Of special interest is how this word is used of our wonderful Lord.  We learn that honor and <strong>majesty</strong> are before Him (Psalm 96:6), and that the LORD is clothed with honor and <strong>majesty</strong>(Psalm 104:1).  This was certainly true of our Lord Jesus Christ in His pre-incarnate state.  We catch a glimpse of Christ in His majesty in Isaiah 6:1-3 (and see John 12:41 in context where the glorious King of Isaiah 6 is identified as Christ).  This splendid King of the Universe stepped out of His ivory palaces and descended to this world of woe.  He laid aside His majestic garments, as it were, and humbled Himself by taking upon Himself our humanity (John 1:14).  In Isaiah 53:2 we have a description of God&#8217;s suffering Servant, the Messiah Himself:  &#8220;when we shall see Him, there is no <span style="text-decoration:underline;"><strong>beauty</strong></span> that we should desire Him.&#8221;  The word &#8220;beauty&#8221; is this same word &#8220;honor&#8221; (majesty, splendor) which is found in Proverbs 31:25.  The Lord laid aside His glorious splendor so that He could die as the perfect Substitute for sinners (Isaiah 53), thus making it possible for the believer to be clothed with garments of majesty and splendor; we who were once dressed only with filthy, bloody rags (Isaiah 64:6, &#8220;filthy rags&#8221;=bloody cloths, rags soiled as the result of menstruation). </p>
<h2>and she shall rejoice (laugh) in time to come</h2>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;rejoice&#8221; (KJV) is the Hebrew word meaning &#8220;laugh.&#8221;  It is used in Ecclesiastes 3:4&#8211;&#8221;A time to weep, and a time <strong>to laugh</strong>.&#8221;   In Psalm 37:12-13 we learn that &#8220;the LORD shall laugh at him (the wicked); for He seeth that his day (of judgment) is coming.&#8221;  </p>
<p align="justify">The virtuous woman will laugh at &#8220;time to come&#8221; (coming time), a clear reference to the days ahead, the future. She will laugh at the future.</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">In reliance on her ample stores, and still more her inward strength and skill, she laughs at the future as respects the evil that it may perchance bring.  This &#8220;laughing at the future&#8221; is of course not to be understood as expressive of a presumptuous self-confidence (see Proverbs 27:1), but only of a consciousness of having all appropriate and possible preparation and competence for the future (<em>Lange&#8217;s Commentary</em>).</span></p>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">Having been so wisely provident for the morrow, she is not overburdened with its cares (<em>Charles Bridges</em>).</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">There is an analogy between this passage and Psalm 2.  In Psalm 2 the armies of the world&#8217;s nations are gathering together to wage war against the LORD and against His Messiah (the Lord Jesus) at the great final battle of Armageddon.  We can imagine the scene.  The world&#8217;s armies aim their weapons toward God (their missiles, their warplanes, their nuclear weapons, etc.).  Mankind against God!   Puny man taking on the Omnipotent One&#8211;how laughable!  It would be like a toy sailboat taking on a massive battleship or an ant trying to do battle against an elephant!  &#8220;He who sitteth in the heavens <strong>shall laugh</strong>.&#8221;  The word &#8220;laugh&#8221; is the same word found in Proverbs 31:25.  The LORD will laugh because He knows that all the armies of the world are not able to hurt Him or defeat Him.  Likewise, the godly woman can laugh at the future because she knows that the future cannot hurt her.  She has made provision for the future, to the best of her ability (as we studied in Proverbs 31:21), and because of her trust in God, she knows that she can face the future with great confidence and optimism. </p>
<p align="justify">It is the privilege of every believer in Christ to confidently laugh at the future.  We have been guaranteed a bright, eternal future.  We have been guaranteed eternal security (John 6:37-40; 10:27-30).  We have the sure promise of God that the future (&#8220;things to come&#8221;) cannot separate us from the love of God (Rom. 8:38).  In fact, in 1 Corinthians 3:22 we learn that we possess the future!  It is ours!  The future belongs to us.  God has marked out a glorious future for every child of God, that we should be conformed to the image of Christ (Rom. 8:29).  This is what predestination is all about.  Never does the New Testament teach that a person is predestinated to hell. The term &#8220;predestination&#8221; is used to teach us that God has marked out a glorious future for every believer. </p>
<p align="justify">Unsaved people dread the future and they have good cause to do so.  They have nothing to look forward to but eternal punishment and an eternity without Christ (Matthew 25:41,46).  Their future promises that, unless they repent, they will perish (Luke 13:3,5).  Unless they repent they will someday hear these frightening words, &#8220;I never knew you; depart from Me, ye that work iniquity (lawlessness)&#8221; (Matthew 7:23 and compare Matthew 25:41). But the saved person can thankfully laugh at the future, knowing that someday he will hear God&#8217;s invitation to enter eternal bliss (see Matthew 25:34).</p>
<p align="justify">How confident we can be!  We do not know what the future holds, but we know WHO holds the future.  We know that everything that happens to us in the future is for God&#8217;s glory and for our good (Romans 8:28).  We are fully persuaded that the God who began a good work in us will complete that good work in the future (Philippians 1:6).</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:26</h1>
<h2>She openeth her mouth with wisdom,<br />
and in her tongue is the law of kindness</h2>
<p align="justify">This is the only verse in this passage which speaks of the godly woman&#8217;s tongue and the words of her mouth.  Our Lord taught that &#8220;out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks&#8221; (Matthew 12:34).  What comes out of our mouth is an indication of what is in the heart.  Our speech reveals our heart.  Out of a wise heart come wise words.  Out of a kind heart come kind words.  Out of a loving heart come loving words.  Be careful when you speak because your heart is showing.</p>
<p align="justify">The word &#8220;kindness&#8221; is the commonly used Hebrew word <span style="text-decoration:underline;">hesed</span>.  It occurs about 200 times in the Old Testament. It is found in the following familiar passages:</p>
<p align="justify">Exodus 20:6&#8211;&#8221;shewing <span style="text-decoration:underline;">mercy</span> unto thousands&#8221;<br />
Ruth 1:8&#8211;&#8221;the Lord deal <span style="text-decoration:underline;">kindly</span> with you&#8221;<br />
Psalm 23:6&#8211;&#8221;surely goodness and <span style="text-decoration:underline;">mercy</span> shall follow me&#8221;<br />
Psalm 100:5&#8211;&#8221;His <span style="text-decoration:underline;">mercy</span> is everlasting&#8221;<br />
Psalm 107:8,15,21,31&#8211;&#8221;Oh that men would praise the LORD for His <span style="text-decoration:underline;">goodness</span>&#8220;<br />
Psalm 107:43&#8211;&#8221;The <span style="text-decoration:underline;">lovingkindness</span> of the LORD&#8221;<br />
Psalm 136 (every verse)&#8211;&#8221;for His <span style="text-decoration:underline;">mercy</span> endureth forever&#8221;<br />
Lamentations 3:22&#8211;&#8221;it is of the LORD&#8217;s <span style="text-decoration:underline;">mercies</span> that we are not consumed&#8221;<br />
Jonah 4:2&#8211;&#8221;slow to anger, and of great <span style="text-decoration:underline;">kindness</span>&#8220;</p>
<p align="justify">The King James Version usually renders this word as &#8220;mercy.&#8221;  Other versions use &#8220;lovingkindness,&#8221;  &#8220;love,&#8221;  or &#8220;steadfast love.&#8221;   William Wilson in his <em>Old Testament Word Studies</em>gives this definition:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">The general import of this word seems to be, the full flow of natural affection, corresponding to <span style="text-decoration:underline;">storg<span style="font-family:'Times New Roman';">é</span></span> in Greek. The Hebrew word for &#8220;stork,&#8221; so remarkable for affection to her young, is derived from this word. The corresponding word in Arabic is used of the flowing of the mother&#8217;s milk to the breasts, so nearly connected with affection for her offspring; hence has been derived, probably, the phrase, &#8220;full of the milk of human kindness.</span></p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify">The law of kindness [<span style="text-decoration:underline;">hesed</span>] is in her tongue.   The term &#8220;law&#8221; [<span style="text-decoration:underline;">torah</span>] refers to instruction.  The term is used in Isaiah 2:3 of the teaching ministry of the Messiah during the millennial kingdom:  &#8220;&#8230;for out of Zion shall go forth the <span style="text-decoration:underline;">law</span> [instruction], and the word of the LORD from Jerusalem.&#8221;</p>
<p align="justify">The instruction of the virtuous woman will be characterized by kindness and steadfast love.  It will be kindly, faithful, loving and gracious instruction.  We assume that the primary targets of her loving instruction are her children and perhaps her household servants.  &#8220;My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the <span style="text-decoration:underline;">law</span> [instruction] of thy mother&#8221; (Prov. 1:8 and see Prov. 6:20,23). </p>
<p align="justify">The godly mother is a teacher.  In love she wants God&#8217;s highest and best for her children.  Women have a valuable and essential teaching ministry according to Titus 2:3-5.</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">The words which come from the lips of the true wife are as a low giving guidance and instruction to those that hear them, but the law is not proclaimed in its sterner aspects, but as one in which &#8220;mercy tempers justice,&#8221; and love, the fulfilling of the law, is seen to be the source from which it springs.  [Barnes, p. 84]</span></p>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">[She is] not talkative and trifling, as most women, but thoughtful and sensible in her words. As idleness is the source of talkativeness (1 Tim. 5:13), so industry is its antidote. [Jamieson, Fausset and Brown, p. 513]</span></p>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">As a sandy hill is to the feet of the aged, so is a wife full of words to a quiet man; but the virtuous woman plagues neither her husband nor any other man with her talk.  She has learned that silence and subjection which the Apostle Paul recommends to wives. She does not lock up her lips in a sullen silence, but when she speaks it is a pleasure to hear her, for she opens her mouth with wisdom. Besides her other labors already mentioned, she rises in the morning, and finds time to read the Bible, and other instructive books; she meditates and reflects, and receives instruction from what she hears, and prays to the Father of lights; and so she improves daily in knowledge and prudence; and when she opens her mouth, she says nothing but what is well worthy of being heard&#8230;.Kindness is painted on her countenance, and flows from her tongue; for it possesses the throne of her heart, and gives law to all her words and actions. [George Lawson, <em>Commentary on Proverbs</em>, pages 568-569]</span></p>
<p align="justify"><span style="color:#800000;">But <em>the godly matron</em> has not only the law of love in her heart, but <em>wisdom in her mouth, and in her tongue the law of kindness</em>. The same love that binds her heart, governs her tongue, not with the caprice, but with <em>the law, of kindness</em>&#8211;a law, which she received from <em>wisdom</em>, and which gives the mould to her whole spirit, so that she says nothing that is foolish, nothing that is ill-natured.  [Charles Bridges, pages 625-626].</span></p>
</blockquote>
<h1>Proverbs 31:27</h1>
<h2>She looketh well to the ways [doings] of her household</h2>
<p align="justify">She &#8220;looketh well&#8221; or keeps watch.  The verb means to look out or about, to spy, to keep watch.  It is used in a  bad sense in Psalm 37:32, &#8220;a wicked man <strong>spieth</strong> upon the righteous.&#8221;   It is used of a watchman in 2 Kings 9:17 and Ezekiel 3:17; 33:7.  A watchman looks for enemies and for anything that may endanger the city.  The godly woman is alertly watching over her household, looking for any danger that may hurt the family:  evil companions, vile entertainment, dangers from the internet, etc.</p>
<p align="justify">As a spy seeks to gather information about the enemy, so the godly woman seeks to find out what is going on with her children.  Some parents do not keep any watch.  They don&#8217;t know what their children do or where they go or what they watch on television or what music they listen to.  The parents need to be very much aware of what is really taking place, so that they can best help their children, discipline them, restrict them as needed, channel them into wholesome and profitable activities, &#8220;looking well to their moral habits, their religious instruction, and attendance on the means of grace; giving them time for secret prayer, and reading the Word of God, bringing them to the daily ordinance of family worship; inculcating the careful observance of the Lord&#8217;s Day; anxiously watching over their manners, habits, and connections&#8230;Who can have the claim to <em>a virtuous woman,</em>who does not feel this weight of family responsibility?&#8221; [Charles Bridges]</p>
<h2>and eateth not the bread of idleness</h2>
<p align="justify">Idleness is not on her diet.  She avoids the carbohydrates of idleness.  She does not indulge herself in idleness.  The word &#8220;idleness&#8221; means sluggishness, laziness.  The word is used in Proverbs 6:6,9; 10:26; 19:15; 24:30.  Anyone who reads the description of the godly woman in Proverbs 31 knows very well that she is anything but lazy!  One wonders how she has enough hours in the day to do all that she does!   Her hours are characterized by diligent industry and laborious involvement in wholesome activities.</p>
<p align="center">&#8220;She worketh willingly with her hands.&#8221;<br />
&#8220;She riseth also while it is yet night.&#8221;<br />
&#8220;She layeth her hand to the spindle.&#8221;<br />
&#8220;She maketh fine linen and selleth it.&#8221;<br />
Etc.</p>
<p align="left">She is the opposite of a sluggard!</p>
<h1>Proverbs 31:28</h1>
<h2>Her children rise up and call her blessed; <br />
her husband also, and he praiseth her.</h2>
<p align="justify">She is praised by her own family members. Those who know her the best praise her the most.  She invested herself in her loved ones, and she is recognized and rewarded by the same. </p>
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<td width="100%">I am acquainted with a nationally known Bible teacher, Old Testament scholar and pioneer in the field of Biblical creationism.  His first wife died of illness, leaving him with several children and no mother.  Not long after this he married a woman who had also lost her spouse through death.  She also had a couple of children from her first marriage.This second marriage resulted in a large family, and most of these children were in their teenage years.  It was quite a challenge!</p>
<p>One day, as the responsibilities of parenthood were especially trying, he remembered Proverbs 31:28 and commented to his wife, &#8220;Dear, as hard as thing are now, just remember that someday your children will rise up and call you blessed.&#8221;  His beloved wife wryly responded, &#8220;Yes, but right now they are just rising up!&#8221;</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
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</div>
<p align="justify">Her husband and children will &#8220;call her blessed&#8221; or pronounce her happy.  This Hebrew term &#8220;blessed&#8221; was used by Leah when she pronounced herself blessed:  &#8220;<strong>Happy</strong> am I, for the daughters will call me <strong>blessed</strong>&#8221; (Genesis 30:13).  The son born of Zilpah was named &#8220;<strong>Asher</strong>&#8221; which is from this same Hebrew term, and means &#8220;happy, blessed&#8221; (Genesis 30:13).</p>
<p align="justify">During the millennial kingdom, all nations will call Him <strong>blessed</strong> (&#8220;Him&#8221; referring to the King Himself, Jesus Christ).</p>
<p align="justify">Godliness and happiness go together.  The godly woman is the happy woman, and she is blessed.  The virtuous woman seeks first the kingdom of God, and all these things (including happiness) are added unto her (Matthew 6:33).  Happiness is a byproduct of honoring the Lord and putting Him first.  It is not an end in itself.  Those who seek happiness and who make that their goal, never find it.  Those who seek the Lord, find in Him their true happiness.  He satisfied the heart that is devoted to Him.</p>
<p align="justify">God&#8217;s formula for happiness is found in the following verses, all of which contain this same Hebrew word &#8220;blessed&#8221; or &#8220;happy&#8221; (Asher):</p>
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<td width="100%"><strong>Blessed (happy)</strong> is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful (Psalm 1:1).<strong>Blessed</strong> are all they that put their trust in him (Psalm 2:12).</p>
<p>O taste and see that the LORD is good: <strong>blessed</strong> is the man that trusteth in him (Psalm 34:8).</p>
<p><strong>Blessed</strong> is that man that maketh the LORD his trust (Psalm 40:4).</p>
<p><strong>Blessed</strong> is the man whose strength is in thee (Psalm 84:5).</p>
<p>O LORD of hosts, <strong>blessed</strong> is the man that trusteth in thee (Psalm 84:12).</p>
<p><strong>Blessed</strong> is the man whom thou chastenest, O LORD, and teachest him out of thy law (Psalm 94:12).</p>
<p><strong>Blessed</strong> is the man that feareth the LORD, that delighteth greatly in his commandments (Psalm 112:1).</p>
<p><strong>Blessed</strong> are the undefiled in the way, who walk in the law of the LORD. <strong>Blessed</strong> are they that keep his testimonies, and that seek him with the whole heart (Psalm 119:1-2).</p>
<p><strong>Blessed</strong> is every one that feareth the LORD; that walketh in his ways (Psalm 128:1).</p>
<p><strong>Happy</strong> is he that hath the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the LORD his God (Psalm 146:5).</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
</div>
<p align="justify">Charles Bridges describes the happiness of the godly woman as follows:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">For what greater earthly happiness could she know, than her children&#8217;s reverence and her husband&#8217;s blessing?  We may picture to ourselves her condition<span style="font-family:'Times New Roman';">—crowned with years; her children grown up; perhaps themselves surrounded with families, and endeavoring to train them, as themselves had been trained.  Their mother is constantly before their eyes.  Her tender guidance, her wise counsels, her loving discipline, her holy example, are vividly kept in remembrance. They cease not to call her blessed, and to bless the Lord for her, as his invaluable gift.  No less does her husband praise her. His attachment to her was grounded, not on the deceitful and vain charms of beauty, but on the fear of the Lord. She is therefore in his eyes to the end, the stay of his declining years, the soother of his cares, the counselor of his perplexities, the comforter of his sorrows, the sunshine of his earthly joys.  (<em>Proverbs</em>, pages 626-627).</span></p>
</blockquote>
<h1>Proverbs 31:29</h1>
<h2>Many daughters have done virtuously, <br />
but thou excellest them all.</h2>
<p align="justify">This verse is different from all the others in this section.  All of the other verses speak about the virtuous woman in the third person.  For example, verses 12-22 all begin with the word &#8220;she.&#8221;   She will do him good&#8230;    She seeketh wool&#8230;   She is like the merchants&#8217; ships&#8230;   She riseth also&#8230; etc.  But in verse 29 the second person pronoun is used for the first time:  &#8220;But<strong>thou (you)</strong> excellest them all.&#8221;   It is more personal, familiar and intimate. Apparently it is her husband himself who is speaking these words.</p>
<p align="justify">At the end of verse 28, we were told that her husband praises her.  In verse 29 we have the husbands praise in his own words:  &#8220;Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.&#8221;</p>
<p align="justify">The Hebrew term for &#8220;daughters&#8221; literally means daughters, but here it is used more generally of women (as in Genesis 30:13).  The word &#8220;virtuously&#8221; is the same word as found in verse 10&#8211;&#8221;Who can find a <strong>virtuous</strong> woman?&#8221;  The term &#8220;virtuous&#8221; is from a noun meaning strength, efficiency, ability.  Here it refers to <strong>strength of character</strong> as well as moral strength and firmness.  See the fuller discussion under Proverbs 31:10.  This husband knew his wife was not the only godly, virtuous woman on the planet.  He knew that there were other God-fearing women of moral strength and of virtuous character.  Such women were rare (verse 10) but they were not extinct.  How we should thank God for all women who live godly in Christ Jesus and who reflect the Person of their Saviour in their walk and talk!  May the beauty of the LORD our God be upon them all (Psalm 90:17).</p>
<p align="justify">The husband then directs his praise to his own wife:  &#8220;but thou excellest them all.&#8221;  You surpass them all!  You have raised yourself above them all.  You are excellent and incomparable!  You surpass all others.  Was this man married to the most virtuous woman in all the world, or did it just seem so to him?   When a man has found a priceless gem (compare verse 10), he considers his treasure better than all others.  To him, she is the most precious wife anyone could ever have.  From his vantage point, no other woman could rival her.  &#8220;There&#8217;s not another woman in the whole world like you!&#8221;  &#8220;When I married you, God gave me the best gift this side of heaven!&#8221;  He lavishes praise upon her, and she does not mind his exaggerations.  In his mind, she excels all others. </p>
<p align="justify">George Lawson says it beautifully:</p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">The praises of her husband will be still more delightful to her ears than those of her children. What earthly happiness can a good wife desire, like the affection and approbation of the guide of her youth?  and this a virtuous woman can scarcely fail of possessing, for what heart has so much marble in it as to be able to resist those virtues which every hour appear in his other self?  He cannot refrain from bestowing praise on one whom he finds the sweetener of all his cares, his faithful adviser in perplexities, his comforter in every distress, the instrument of a great part of his earthly felicity; his best friend, his unceasing joy, and his brightest crown.  No wonder if the experience of such goodness and happiness makes him eloquent in her praise, and draws commendations from his tongue, that must be understood in a restricted sense to make them true. He prefers her to every other wife who ever lived upon earth; and he is sincere in doing it, for she ravishes his heart by the beauties of her mind and conversation.  Piety will dispose a man to think meanly of himself, in comparison with other men, but highly of his wife, when he compares her with other women (<em>Proverbs</em>, p. 570).</p>
</blockquote>
<h1>Proverbs 31:30</h1>
<h2>Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain</h2>
<p align="justify">There is a German proverb which says, &#8220;Every woman would rather be beautiful than good.&#8221;  Glenn Conjurske has commented on this proverb as follows: </p>
<blockquote>
<p align="justify">By nature, at any rate.  And it is certainly true that most of them sacrifice goodness and godliness in the pursuit of fashion, or whatever else they think may make them beautiful.  Yet she who chooses to pursue godliness instead of fashion sacrifices none of her beauty for it.  She may indeed gain some, for beauty in the heart puts beauty on the face.</p>
</blockquote>
<p align="justify"><span><span style="font-size:x-large;">(to be continued)</span></span></p>
<h2>But a woman who feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.</h2>
<p align="justify"> </p>
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<td colspan="3" width="100%" height="18" align="middle" bgcolor="#FFCCFF"><span style="font-family:'Arial Black';color:#0000ff;font-size:medium;">Comparison of Ruth &amp; the Proverbs 31 Woman</span></td>
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<td width="32%" height="18"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Devoted to her family</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="18" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 1:15-18</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="18" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs  31:10, 11, 12, 23</span></td>
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<tr>
<td width="32%" height="18"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Delighted in her work</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="18" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 2:2</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="18" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs  31:13</span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="32%" height="18"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Diligent in her labor</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="18" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 2:7,17,23</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="18" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs  31:14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 24, 27</span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="32%" height="18"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Dedicated to godly speech</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="18" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 2:10,13</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="18" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs  31:26</span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="32%" height="14"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Dependent on God</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="14" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 2:12</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="14" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs  31:25b, 30</span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="32%" height="19"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Dressed with care</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="19" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 3:3</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="19" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs  31:22, 25a</span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="32%" height="19"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Discreet with men</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="19" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 3:6–13</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="19" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs   31:11, 12, 23</span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="32%" height="19"><strong><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Delivered blessings</span></strong></td>
<td width="29%" height="19" bgcolor="#CCFF99"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Ruth 4:14,15</span></td>
<td width="39%" height="19" bgcolor="#FFFF00"><span style="font-family:Arial;color:#000080;">Proverbs   31:28, 29</span></td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
</div>
</div>
<p align="justify"> </p>
<h3>A CONTRAST</h3>
<p> </p>
<div>
<table border="2" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="9" width="638" bgcolor="#FFFF99">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="28" align="center" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#FFCCFF"><span style="font-size:large;"><strong>THE VOLUPTUOUS WOMAN</strong></span></td>
<td width="52%" height="28" align="center" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#FFCCFF"><span style="font-size:large;"><strong>THE VIRTUOUS <br />
WOMAN</strong></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="29" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">Described in the first 9 chapters of Proverbs.</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="29" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">Described in Proverbs chapter 31.</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="29" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS LEWD (Proverbs 6:24; 2:17).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="29" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS LOYAL (Proverbs 31:11).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="28" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS A HOME BREAKER (Proverbs 7).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="28" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS A HOME MAKER (Proverbs 31).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="41" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS EASY TO FIND (Proverbs 7:10-12).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="41" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS HARD TO FIND<br />
(a rare gem) (Proverbs 31:10).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="29" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS CHEAP (Proverbs30:20)</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="29" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS PRECIOUS (Proverbs 31:10)</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="46" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE HAS OUTER BEAUTY<br />
Surface attraction (Proverbs 6:25).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="46" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE HAS INNER BEAUTY<br />
Heart attraction (Proverbs 31:30; 1 Peter 3:4).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="47" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE WORKS WITH HER MOUTH<br />
(lively lips but no life) (Proverbs 21:9,19; 25:24 etc.).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="47" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE WORKS WITH HER HANDS<br />
(a lovely life producing loving words) (Proverbs 31, many verses).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="29" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS RELIGIOUS (Proverbs 7:14).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="29" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS RIGHT WITH GOD (Proverbs 31:30).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="29" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS OUTSIDE THE HOME <br />
(Proverbs 7:11-12).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="29" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE ABIDES IN THE HOME (Proverbs 31:27).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="47" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE DOES HER HUSBAND NOTHING BUT HARM (Proverbs 2:17).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="47" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE DOES HER HUSBAND GOOD (Proverbs 31:12).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="46" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS ON THE LOOSE AT NIGHT (Proverbs 7:9,18).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="46" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE IS RESTING AT NIGHT SO SHE CAN AWAKE EARLY (Proverbs 31:15).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="29" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE KILLS HER VICTIMS (Proverbs 7:23).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="29" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE BLESSES HER FAMILY (Proverbs 31:28).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td width="48%" height="22" valign="TOP" bgcolor="#99CCFF"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE LIVES BY LUST (Proverbs 7:10).</span></td>
<td width="52%" height="22" valign="TOP"><span style="font-size:small;">SHE LIVES BY LOVE (Proverbs 31:20).</p>
<p></span></td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
</div>
<hr class="ssline" />
<p align="justify"> </p>
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		<title>From Alicia&#8230;.</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/12/from-alicia/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/12/from-alicia/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 12 Jun 2008 10:14:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=11</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My favorite disciple has always been John.  He referred to himself as the &#8220;disciple whom Jesus loved.&#8221;  It wasn&#8217;t that he was being arrogant or bragging because Jesus loved him and not the other disciples.  In fact, Jesus loved John the same as he loved the rest of them.  John just knew how much he [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=11&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My favorite disciple has always been John.  He referred to himself as the &#8220;disciple whom Jesus loved.&#8221;  It wasn&#8217;t that he was being arrogant or bragging because Jesus loved him and not the other disciples.  In fact, Jesus loved John the same as he loved the rest of them.  John just knew how much he was loved.  He was so excited about being loved by Jesus, that it became is identification.  Truth is when you know that you are loved it truly changes your identity.</p>
<p>Over the past year, God has given me an identity change.  Since I was a child I feared that I wouldn&#8217;t be loved; that fear of rejection plagued me.  It&#8217;s probably why I, like many others, would apologize for who I am.  It made me want to deepen my voice so others wouldn&#8217;t hear that high pitched squeal.  It&#8217;s what caused me to hold back my excitement to avoid acting like some giddy blonde.  I could try to look hard, but truth is I&#8217;m really all smiles.  I have my hood moments, but when I answer the phone and sound like &#8220;a white girl,&#8221; it&#8217;s a dead giveaway that I was raised in the burbs.  It&#8217;s who I am.</p>
<p>Let&#8217;s be real; while people may try to be someone else, who they really are will eventually shine through.  I can deepen my voice but if you are around me long enough, you are going to hear me sound like Alvin and the chipmunks.  Those blonde moments are real, hence, the highlights (lol).  And for the record, all white people do not talk proper.  But, more importantly, it&#8217;s me without apologies.</p>
<p>You ever been apologizing for yourself, and someone says, &#8220;Oh, I love that about you!&#8221;  All of a sudden, you&#8217;re not sorry anymore, and it&#8217;s ok to be you.  There is such a great freedom in being loved, because you don&#8217;t have to strive anymore.  You can rest and literally bathe in being loved; you&#8217;re not trying to fix yourself so you&#8217;ll get love, when you already have it.  You just soak in it.</p>
<p>(I&#8217;ve been told not to tell people this story, but it&#8217;s too awesome not to share.)</p>
<p>One day, I was on my way to work and just talking to God in the car.  We were talking about how He made everyone so unique and He actually meant to do that.  Then, God tells me the sweetest thing ever.  It absolutely made my day.  God tells me that He loves my hair.  When it clicks that he loves my hair.  I gasp, my voice goes an octave higher, and in blonde teenage hysteria, I yell, &#8220;Jesus you love my hair!&#8221;  Then the thought settles, I sigh, my eyes water, and I softly whisper, &#8220;You love my hair.&#8221;</p>
<p>It was one of those holy moments in time, when God tells you something that is so intimate that it not only changes what you think about yourself but changes what you think about Him.  I was excited, then humbled that God would even have an opinion on my hair.  But, then again, he created my hair, made that wild curly texture, and even has each hair numbered.  My eyes still water at the thought that he loves me that much.</p>
<p>(&#8220;How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered. Ps 139:17)</p>
<p>It&#8217;s not just that he loves me.  God knows how he created each of us.  He made the extrovert outgoing on purpose, and that wall flower is just as beautiful to him too.  He loves those artsy flower children like me and those boring analytical people too (j/k about the boring part).  He made us so differently, yet all for his glory.  Whether a person is a deep and reflective introvert or spacey extrovert, God loves our uniqueness.  He&#8217;s not trying to change our personality, but rather he perfects our character as to bring out the best in us.</p>
<p>When you recognize and celebrate how much God loves you, it&#8217;s so much easier to celebrate other people.  You know, I think I&#8217;m beautiful.  I really believe that beauty radiates from me.  That&#8217;s not an arrogant statement or one that I should apologize for.  It&#8217;s a celebratory statement.  I love me, and I haven&#8217;t always.  But, it makes it so easy to love other people.  I see my beauty and celebrate it, so when I see other beautiful women, I can celebrate them too.  I don&#8217;t think people realize it but there&#8217;s no competition in love, but rather rest and freedom.<span>  </span>I&#8217;ve found so my peace and joy…I&#8217;ve found my identity in being the babygyrl whom Jesus loves.</p>
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		<title>Sometimes I lay in bed at night&#8230;.</title>
		<link>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/11/sometimes-i-lay-in-bed-at-night/</link>
		<comments>http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/2008/06/11/sometimes-i-lay-in-bed-at-night/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Jun 2008 21:36:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>angelajwms</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://mssoconfused.wordpress.com/?p=9</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[And remember when he used to occupy the other side. Sometimes I sit on the couch, and half expect him to use his key to open the door. Boo hiss. Time to hit the gym&#8230;these 25 pounds won&#8217;t lose themself&#8230;if that makes any sense.<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=mssoconfused.wordpress.com&amp;blog=3813249&amp;post=9&amp;subd=mssoconfused&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>And remember when he used to occupy the other side. Sometimes I sit on the couch, and half expect him to use his key to open the door. Boo hiss. Time to hit the gym&#8230;these 25 pounds won&#8217;t lose themself&#8230;if that makes any sense.</p>
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